Everybody is Kung Fu Fighting, While I Started a Farm

Chapter 267: Actually Planting A Real, Living Person

The rice paddy Jiang He planted at the start had begun to sprout, with dense patches of rice shoots breaking out of the ground rapidly like mushrooms after rain.

Judging from their growth, Jiang He estimated that the rice can be harvested in three hours. By tomorrow, he could eat the fragrant big-grain rice he himself planted.

That was when a question came to Jiang He’s mind—

‘Do I have to water my paddy field?’

After musing to himself for a while, Jiang He got an answer and thought, ‘Most likely not, given how special this farm is... but would paddy be paddy without water?’

Either way, Dumbo and Trumbo both possessed water-type powers.

He just had to get them to water it.

Jiang He’s opinion is that rice from dried paddy would be soulless when consumed.

Soon, the Doom Shrooms began to grow as well.

The many pitch-black shrooms that resembled ‘dog pee caps’ were rapidly growing out of the earth and Jiang He counted that the Doom Shrooms would grow in batches of fifty...

Jiang He scowled unhappily then.

Fifty in each batch...and judging from the growth rate, it would take over two hours to finish harvesting them.

And even if he did not sleep or rest, the 1,342 Doom Shrooms would need at least sixty hours to be fully harvested.

But that was fine.

Jiang He’s impression was that he never fell short compared to others when it comes to diligence and weathering hardships.

“What’s going on?”

“The Mysterious Seeds I planted have not budded yet?”

“Hasn’t it been twenty minutes already?”

The pebblelike black ‘Mysterious Seed’ had been planted for some time, but it might have a longer growth cycle because it was not showing any reaction.

Still, waiting for a crop to mature is a long process.

Jiang He believed that as a diligent farmer, he must learn how to use his free time to work as well.

He took out the Dragoncroc Emperor’s corpse and cut a quarter of it and threw it to the Cloudscraper Vine. The meat of a prehistoric mutant Feral was an incredible supplement for the Cloudscraper Vine and it was more effective than the Feral King corpses even if it was just a quarter.

All eighteen tendrils of the Cloudscraper Vine curled into itself, the needles beneath the branches and leaves stabbing into the Dragoncroc Emperor’s flesh and began to absorb the essence within.

The many tendrils then began to glimmer in green light, slowly lengthening and thickening.

“Oh, right!”

“They are both unique plant life. And since the Cloudscraper Vine can evolve and strengthen by consuming Feral meat, what about the willow tree?”

Jiang He turned his eyes and looked towards the ten-meter tall willow tree that had already grown a massive tree crown.

Piles of whitened bones lay beneath the shade of Mount Helan’s willow tree. Every Feral and beast that passed beneath its tree crown were whipped to death by its branches, their blood and flesh becoming its growing nourishment.

Nonetheless, Jiang He asked about it.

The branches of the willow tree swayed and a thought rippled.

“Master... I... I don’t know, but eating meat is so dirty!”

Wow.

And it was even acting cute.

Jiang He couldn’t help chuckling. It did make sense after some thought—was it reasonable for the ‘willow tree girl’ to eat Ferals every single day?

If that’s so, I think I probably wouldn’t kiss even if it assumes human form...hold on, why would I think that?

Jiang He was stunned by his own idea.

That...is a tree!

Why would he have such lewd thoughts about a tree?

What a beast!

“Well...”

Jiang He studied the willow tree which tree crown spawned several dozens meters. Even as he listened to the willow tree’s tenderly crisp voice, he could not help thinking, ‘So what if it’s a willow tree? It might transform in the future, and become a great beauty.’

So what if I think such things about my willow tree?

Love cannot be bound by factors like race or age. What if a little immortal lady who lived several thousand years old wanted to pursue a relationship with him? Could he refuse her?

Hmmm...

About that... I don’t think the answer is certain since it depends on said immortal lady’s looks and personality...

Jiang He put away the many complicated thoughts in his mind and asked, “Right, have you tried Sky Daemon Invincibility?”

“I can’t cultivate it.”

The willow tree’s many branches slumped, appearing desolate.

Jiang He consoled it, saying, “The Sky Daemon Invincibility is a daemonic cultivation but you are a plant, so it’s normal for you to be unable to cultivate it... Legend has it that there are many great abilities that plant life can cultivate, so something suitable for you might have been passed down. I’ll get you something in the future.”

Delighted, the willow branches glinted in emerald light, its slumped posture all gone without a trace.

Jiang He scowled.

Why was the willow tree such an actress too?

Still...

It was very likely that he could find a cultivation method for plant life.

“Ancient daemons might know such cultivations... maybe I could go to Shennongjia and ask that daemonic cultivator who materialized his Yuan Spirit...”

“I could create something myself even if I can’t get anything from him. Legend has it that the Willow God and the Cyan Emperor were plant life that had cultivated into almighties, so with some referencing, it would not be that difficult to create a plant-life cultivation method myself.”

Then, Jiang He took out some Orirocks and handed them to the Willow Tree.

“These are Orirrocks and they contain pure Yuan Qi. It works for both humans and daemons—since plant life evolve and strengthen by absorbing Yuan Qi, they would be useful for you as well.”

Without a proper cultivation method, relying solely on absorbing the Yuan Qi in Orirocks would definitely see a portion of the Yuan Qi wasted or oozing out. Still, Jiang He had all the Orirocks he needed and since keeping them served no purpose, wasting five thousand Orirocks was nothing.

After that, Jiang He called upon the two golden eaglets.

The two golden eaglets were definitely mutants that had inherited the Golden-Winged Roc’s bloodline. In just a few days, they appear much larger and stronger, even flying briefly on low altitudes by flapping their wings.

Of course, that was far from enough.

Jiang He were grooming the two golden eaglets as mount. Why bother if they could only fly several hundred meters above air and eight hundred meters distances?

“The two golden eaglets probably could cultivate Sky Daemon Invincibility... Dumbo, you’re in charge of supervising their cultivation. Here’s another 1,000 Orirocks—share it between them.”

“The Orirocks are effective for divine-tier elites, even Void-tier elites. Using it to cultivate would quickly bring you up to full-fledge rank-nines... After that happens, I’ll come up with something to help you reach Daemon Pellet-tier.”

After cultivating a daemonic cultivation, they would not be Feral Kings after surpassing rank-nine, but Daemon Pellet-tier eminences.

It was more less the same situation with the Graywolf King back then.

And since Jiang He had planted three Condensed Pellet Fruits from the Graywolf King’s corpse, it was not a problem for Dumbo and the others to ascend with those.

As for the Seven Bottle Gourd Brothers, their cultivation was relatively dull and boring. They were all simply going ‘hetui’ skyward to breathe air blades, and after doing that for three days, they had actually managed to grasp blade will...

Perhaps that was their cultivation talent.

Jiang He was actually a little of jealous of their talent on the path of blades, since he did not have such talent himself. In fact, he had to force himself to grasp blade will by leveling his blade techniques.

After around two hours...the first batch of Doom Shrooms were ripe.

[Ding!]

[+1,000 Farm Points.]

Jiang He plucked one of the Doom Shrooms and looked at it closely, before shaking his head and chuckling sadly. “My hunch is right. Without Mysterious Soil, the power of the Doom Shrooms is much weaker.”

The explosive yield of Doom shrooms with half a pack of Mysterious Soil was five hundred thousand tons, whereas Doom Shrooms with one pellet of nitrogen fertilizer was merely three hundred thousand tons.

“Ah!”

Jiang He sighed. “Three hundred thousand tons it is, it is more or less enough...”

After plucking the first batch of 50 Doom Shrooms, Jiang He was about to harvest the paddy when his eye turned towards the spot where he planted the Mysterious Seed.

It had sprouted two lotus leaves at some unknown point in time with a lotus flower at the center.

Jiang He looked closely at the center of the lotus flower, and found a thumb-sized... hourglass figure?

As the leaves and the flower grew larger, the hourglass figure also slowly grew.

“What the hell!”

Jiang He was dumbstruck.

A real, living person had really grown out of the Mysterious Seed?

As he walked up and studied the hourglass figure at the center of the flower, he could not help gasping in surprise...

That woman is so beautiful!

Her facial features were exquisite and her figure fantastic.

Even though she was merely thumb-sized, he noticed that she appeared to have a certain anime-style about her.

Hold on...

Anime?

Jiang He’s eyes widened, and could not help thinking about a woman in one of the classics... and it matched the figure growing at the center of the white lotus flower perfectly.

“What was that anime called?”

“Voyage?”

“One Piece?

“Right, right, it’s One Piece...”

“And what was that character’s name? Charlotte Linlin?”

“No, no. Wasn’t Charlotte Linlin the Big Mom, one of the four emperors? Fat and ugly? No, this one is named Hancock or something!”

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