Everybody is Kung Fu Fighting, While I Started a Farm

Chapter 270: My Insomnia Is Relapsing?

On the white pistil, Boa Hancock was folding her arms before her chest and sleeping soundly...

But why would Jiang He find that description a little weird?

His eyes were still fixed on Boa’s body.

She was clothed, wearing something resembling a qipao—sleeveless and open-collar, and the skirt slit almost reached the hip.

Maybe because it felt breezier wearing that.

Either way, the first impression she had on Jiang He was... beautiful.

Everything from her facial features to her figure to her body ratio was perfect. If he had to put his finger on one flaw, it was her breasts being too huge... almost on Mu Wanqiu’s level.

Of course, that would be nitpicking.

Another person’s looks were her own business.

Sick of grains? Even carrots and green veggies have their own admirers.

One must not deny others just because they are big.

“Wonder how that feels to the touch, though...”

Jiang He plucked Boa Hancock off the pistil.

[Ding!]

[+30,000 Farm Points.]

A System Notification jingled beside his ear.

Jiang He stared at Boa Hancock closely, watching as the beautiful brows over her closed eyes twitched.

Then, she slowly opened her eyes.

Her pupils were dark-blue, just like the depths of the deep blue sea.

Upon seeing Jiang He, Boa immediately bowed and greeted him reverently, “Master...”

With her open collar which was a little large in the first place, once she arched her back... well, describing it in detail was inconvenient.

Her data popped up in front of Jiang He’s eyes as well.

[Boa Hancock]

[Ability: Mero-Mero Fruit]

[Skill 1, Mero-Mero Mellow: Boa Hancock forms a heart with her hands and fires a heart-shaped beam from them. Those attracted to Boa Hancock would turn to stone when struck by the beam.]

[Skill 2, Perfume Femur: A kick that instantly turns a part of the target’s body into stone and shatters it. Note: applies to inorganic objects.]

[Skill 3, Slave Arrow: Hancock breathes in deeply and kisses out a giant heart. She then pulls the heart back like a bow, firing hundreds of pink arrows that would petrify the target, regardless of whether they are attracted to the Empress. Note: applies to inorganic objects.]

Outrageous!

Jiang He could not help exclaiming in awe.

He had watched One Piece before, and the many Devil Fruits depicted were unbelievably powerful...

“But shouldn’t there be limits to such abilities?”

Jiang He thought and smiled. “Boa Hancock, use your skills on me.”

“Master, that’s...”

There was a flash of hesitance on Boa Hancock’s face.

Jiang He’s crops were fully loyal to him, but that did not mean it was blind loyalty.

For example, if Boa felt that her powers would harm Jiang He, she naturally would hesitate.

Jiang He smiled. “It’s fine, do it.”

Boa nodded tamely and coquettishly spoke, “Master, I shall attack now. Please be careful.”

In the original work, Boa Hancock’s personality was tsundere, whimsical, and held great disdain for those she felt to be beneath her, often kicking out at little creatures like kittens or what not.

Ooom!

A unique pulse of energy arose over her body.

She held her hands before her chest and made a heart gesture, and that energy instantly formed a pink love beam that shot towards Jiang He.

Jiang He did not move an inch, allowing the love beam to land squarely on himself. Flexing his body a little, he said, “Not bad, not bad. Your Mero-Mero Mellow does not petrify me, but in the instant that it hits me, my body stiffened for half a second, and my agility dropped considerably.”

What was half a second to the average person? Just a blink of an eye.

However, for a fatal battle for elites on Jiang He’s level, it was enough to decide between life or death.

Then, Boa Hancock unleashed Perfume Femur and Slave Arrow on Jiang He too.

For the former, her alabaster feet rubbed all over Jiang He’s body to the point that his thoughts were going wild.

As for Slave Arrow...

It was not much different from a flying kiss for him.

Frowning, Jiang He asked, “Could you three skills be released using another style?”

“I can’t, Master...”

“Try training yourself.”

Jiang He said. “Wear your shoes when using Perfume Femur... as for the other two skills, try some other variants. How could I bear having my woman throw hearts and flying kisses out at others?”

Jiang He got the general idea after personally testing Boa Hancock’s skills and abilities.

She was not physically powerful, but when applied well, her Mero-Mero Fruit skills could take down even martial artists on Three Blades Lin’s level.

“As for physique...”

“That’s simple. Eat a little more cucumber, eggplant, and black wood ears to strengthen yourself a little...”

Jiang He then led Boa to the mansion and introduced her to Sora.

Yes, with two maids now, things were much more convenient with them cooking and cleaning around the house.

A thought occurred to Jiang He then, and he took out the other two Mysterious Seeds and planted one.

He was a little hopeful.

What would grow this time around?

After having supper, Jiang He continued harvesting Doom Shrooms.

As for the Mysterious Soil... it would take eight hours for it to sprout, bear fruit and ripen, so there were no rushing things.

That was why Jiang He prepared to get back inside the house to sleep.

Everything could wait until he wakes up.

***

Meanwhile.

Martial Arts Department (MAD) Headquarters, Jingdu City.

Wang Hou, Lin Tianzheng, Pei Donglai, and Three Blades Lin had returned to the city. Along the way, Wang Hou had issued orders for every elite hunting Feral Kings to withdraw from their missions.

“Right now, the Hua Nation only has eight Feral Kings left after the Scarlet Fox King was whisked away by the Fox Elder. Even if there were Feral King hiding deep within the mountains, there would not be too many them.”

“They must be scared witless now, and wouldn’t dare to cause trouble in the next two years.”

Wang Hou looked around at the others, mused to himself for a long while before summoning Zhou Yu and asked, “What’s everyone’s opinion after today’s proceedings?”

The office was silent for a while after he spoke.

Three Blades Lin was the first to speak. “Minister Wang, gramps... does the Hua Nation have ancient martial artists or cultivators in seclusion?”

“With the ancient daemon cultivators making their appearances one after another but the human cultivators nowhere to be seen, that Scarlet Fox King’s tiny tower would block even my strongest strike, even though it was severely injured and when it was my equal in power in the first place... If this continues, there’s no winning for us—how could we compete against the Ferals when the ancient daemon cultivators groomed more daemon eminences?”

“Wenshu!”

Lin Tianzheng scolded. “Do not speak lightly. There are elites in the Hua Nation, slumbering and cultivating in secret unknown to the world. They are unable awaken as long as the timing isn’t right.”

Three Blades Lin smiled but said nothing.

Lin Tianzheng was his ancestor by blood.

But if anyone else would dare to pull such nonsense in his face, he would not spare them even if he could not win—anything could wait after hitting them for half-an-hour!

Timing isn’t right?

Unable to awaken?

Then sleep forever. Why bother waking up?

Beside them, Wang Hou simply smiled. “We can’t pin our hopes on the ancients... So what if they awaken?

“Would they protect our country?

“Would they fight for the Hua Nation?

“That’s not very likely, is it?”

Wang Hou stood up and sighed. “They’ve lived for thousands of years, and what they pursue would only be their respective paths... the era they lived and served had been destroyed in the course of history, and putting our hopes on them... is impractical.”

“I could only hope that those codgers that are too old to die wouldn’t give me more problems. I would thank the heavens for that!”

Suddenly, Wang Hou’s tone changed as he growled, “We could only depend on ourselves for everything now. And I’ve decided I would take a leave of absence to wander, meditate and take my time to cultivate...”

“Minister Wang...”

Zhou Yu quickly asked before even Wang Hou finished, “What about the MAD?”

Wang Hou chuckled. “Aren’t you here, Old Zhou? I’m never worried as long as you’re at the helm. Moreover, I’m just wandering and not disappearing—just give me a call when something comes up.”

Zhou Yu could not decide if he should laugh or cry.

‘Call you?

‘Are you sure a call would reach you when the time comes?’

Still, that was not the time for that.

“Minister Wang,” Zhou Yu said with a solemn look. “I have an important piece of news...”

“We’ve received word from intelligence officers across the land that every Sky Demon Cultists suspect they had been monitoring are leaving their respective city bases... several wiretaps intercepted exchanges that they are gathering at the headquarters of the Sky Demon Cult.”

“There really is no end to that cheap drama!”

Wang Hou was a little lost for words.

Still, his gaze soon turned solemn.

The Sky Demon Cult gathering every cultist definitely would not be for fun and games...

“Activate every asset. We must find out the goal of the Sky Demon Cult!” Wang Hou ordered.

While Yan Dehao was the only undercover agent they had in the upper hierarchy of the Sky Demon Cult, there were quite a lot of other double agents seeded in the bottom levels of the cult.

They usually would have no authority to enter Sky Demon Cult Headquarters or come in contact with their hierarchy, which was why they usually were not assigned any missions.

But now, they must all be put to work!

***

Meanwhile.

Jinyintan Village.

Jiang He was tossing and turning in his soft, large bed... feeling not one ounce of drowsiness.

‘How irritating!

‘Could my insomnia be relapsing?’

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