Everybody is Kung Fu Fighting, While I Started a Farm

Chapter 368: Inspired King and Black Wind King

What the heck?

“Who would have so much free time to convert you lot?” Jiang He exclaimed in shock. “Hold on... did you really just convert?”

As he imagined, something was definitely wrong since Eldest Brother kept chanting Amitabha and was calling him ‘sir’ instead of ‘gramps’.

Meanwhile, Eldest Brother was crying endlessly and sobbing, “Gramps, after we entered the Bodhimanda and followed the Buddha’s glow, we became muddleheaded and was converted by two fishes. They said that we have Buddha Roots, and would accept us as disciples until the Boddhisatva or something returns, and we shall serve her then.”

The Boddhisatva?

Jiang He’s gaze twitched.

That referred to Guanyin, did it not?

Did this mean that his world view would be broadened again, and now progress toward divine myths?

Still, Jiang He was not too surprise since he had expected it.

Then, irritated by Eldest Brother’s endless crying, he scolded, “Shut it and stop crying. Don’t worry, not even the greatest god could convert you.”

And Jiang He was very confident about that.

While most people would be completely indoctrinated after their conversion, the Seven Bottle Gourd Brothers and the two eagles would not have such problems... after all, Jiang He had planted them—just look at Eldest Brother, who was solemnly saying things like Amitabha and sir, looking as if he had renounced the profane to become a true Buddhist.

Even so, he returned to normal with just one slap from Jiang He.

As Eldest Brother led the way ahead, Jiang He followed him while Dumbo and Trumbo looked around them curiously. The Bodhimanda was actually a temple laden in mist, which gave the feeling that one had walked into a godly realm.

There was another purple bamboo forest behind the temple and a fishpond beside it.

White jade bars sculpted with dragons and phoenix images surrounded the fishpond where lotus flowers grew, and it was quite a beautiful sight.

Like other spots, the fishpond was wafting with mists too.

“Eh?”

Eldest Brother walked a lap around the fishpond, but his eyes turned red again and he sobbed, “Gramps, Second Brother and the others were still here just now... I knew it, the two fishes ate them!”

“Fishes?”

“Yes, two fishes that could speak. One is golden and the other black, and they were inside the fishpond.”

Jiang He looked at the fishpond then, only to find that the mist seemed to block divine minds, and not even he could see through it.

He then remembered the legend of Guanyin... the Boddhisatva liked rearing pets, some of which were depicted in Journey to the West.

“What was the name of her fishes?”

“Thingmajig and Jigmathing?”

“Was that it? Why does it feel so weird...”

Jiang He shook his head and gave up on thinking about it, saying, “Don’t worry. If those really were Guanyin’s fishes, they most likely wouldn’t eat people. Second Brother the others are born lucky as well, and won’t die.”

Still, his gaze lingered on the white jade bars around the fishpond.

That thing was really beautiful and much more profound than bamboo fences or whatnot.

“Dumbo, Trumbo, get going and dismantle that bar.”

Dumbo and Trumbo went to work immediately at his command, but the bars would not budge no matter how they tried to shift it, and Jiang He ended up having to move it himself.

“Eh?”

Jiang He could not move the white jade bars at all even if he grasped it firmly.

As it did not budge an inch even after using as much strength as he could, he eventually resorted to violence, whipping out Mosquito Cutter. Still, just as he was about to swing his sword, the mist over the fishpond churned and a jet of water shot up, on top of which a golden fish floated. Its round eyes were glaring as it barked, “How dare you, thief! What do you think you are you doing?!”

“Biubiubiubiu...”

It pursed its mouth and spat several shots of water at Jiang He.

Even before Jiang He moved, however, Eldest Brother roared in rage, “How dare you hurt Gramps, devil?! Biu... biu...”

Eldest Brother had opened his mouth and fired two air blades.

Jiang He was dumbstruck.

It was a painful sight.

Furious, the golden fish exclaimed, “You have converted to Buddhism, and yet you would disrespect the sentinels?”

Biubiu~~~

Eldest Brother went, “Biubiu~~~”

Hence, both fish and child kept spitting at each other, splashing water and air blades everywhere—even so, the golden fish had no intention to do harm or one spit would have been enough to kill Eldest Brother.

Not bothered with them, Jiang He raised his sword to cut the white jade bars instead.

Others notwithstanding, it was just as expected of an immortal weapon—two swings and a chunk of the white jade bars was cut down.

“How dare you!”

The golden fish released his aura right then, just as a black figure shot out from the fishpond as well.

It was a black fish around five feet, which was shining all over with Buddha’s glow as well, and his cultivation was equal to the golden fish.

Regardless, Jiang He kept an impassive face as he placed the five-feet chunk of the white jade bar into his System Backpack, smiling, “Brothers, calm down. I’m just taking this chunk.”

Both fishes appear rather wary toward Jiang He, but still scolded him strictly.

Jiang He, however, smiled. “Thingmajig, Jigmathing... you converted my mounts and grandkids without consent, so why the blabbing when I only took a chunk of your bar? I’ll dismantle this Bodhimanda if you keep talking, okay?”

Having witnessed how Jiang He cracked the array outside by force, the fishes stopped scolding and instead asked, “What do you mean, Thingmajig, Jigmathing?”

“What, aren’t those your names?”

Jiang He discreetly plucked a few lotus flowers too.

Those had been nurtured for untold years and were basically sentient, and would certainly not lose out to spirit medicines. Seeing that Jiang He wasn’t plucking a lot, the two fishes did not bother him.

Then, the golden fish said, “My name is Inspired King, not Thingmajig.”

“And I’m Black Wind King,” the black fish added.

The Inspired King?

A golden fish?

Jiang He recognized that name, since it was the fish of Tongtian River.

But as for the Black Wind King...

Wasn’t it supposed to be a black bear spirit?

Why was it a black fish instead?

Could Journey to the West be wrong?

Still, Jiang He did not dwell on it and scooped up several puffs of the wafting mists.

Unable to hold it in any longer, the golden fish said angrily, “Sir, that’s enough.”

Even so, how could these few puffs suffice?

Having been inspired by Guanyin’s Bodhimanda, Jiang He was about to throw the mist in his farm and yard, speaking as he did so, “You two converted my gramps and mounts without consent. Wouldn’t these items be enough for compensation?”

The black fish changed form into a pitch-black Dhutanga monk and chanted a Buddhist mantra. “Amitabha. Sir, we did not force them into conversion. They are simply karmically connected to our Buddha and therefore initiated, and they are now accepting our legacies.”

At the same time, the golden fish promptly inhaled sharply, and the mist wafting all over the Bodhimanda surged inside his body and was collected entirely.

On the other hand, Jiang He whipped out his Mosquito Cutter and invoked the Sword Array of Ten Realms and Infinity. As the terrific might of the sword array shook the entire Bodhimanda, he sneered and said, “You mongrels. I was being calm with you guys and giving you face, but neither of you would afford me the same courtesy?”

“I would have slaughtered you for my grill if not for the Boddhisatva. And you are upset with me just taking a little mist?”

As Jiang He leapt forward with his sword, Sword Will swirled and filled the fish pond, preventing both fishes from escaping inside the fishpond.

“Give me another three hundred meters of that white jade bar and thirty of those lotus flowers,” Jiang He added coolly then.

“The Inspired King, was it?”

“Spit out the mist you absorbed!”

Still, not one to be outdone, the golden fish transformed into an ugly man that had fish scales growing on his red face and drew out a nine-petaled scarlet hammer with a turn of his hand. “Sir,” he said quietly, “do you really take us brothers for small fries?”

Then, as Jiang He’s sword shot out and his Sword Qi erupted, both Black Wind King and Inspired King unleashed various moves to repel it, causing crisp cracking sounds.

However, Jiang He caughter their auras and whipped out two three-retributions Violet Sky Thunder Talisman. With a charge of mystic energy, thunder talisman turned into thunderclouds, and two violet thunderbolts descended immediately.

Boom-crack!

Stunned, both fishes were struck and left charred.

Buddha glow arose over their bodies as they charted their protective mystic treasures.

Boom-crack!

Two more violet thunderbolts descended and struck the fishes, and their Buddha glow dulled immediately as their mystic treasures shattered.

Jiang He then turned his hand, taking out a dozen Violet Sky Thunder Talismans, and smiled. “I do consider you two small fries. What do you have to say about that?”

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