Everybody is Kung Fu Fighting, While I Started a Farm

Chapter 398: Hooking Up With Some Dragon Ladies

Jiang He studied the old Daemon Monkey from head to toe with a rather weird gaze.

The old Daemon Monkey laughed sillily, embarrassed from the stare.

“Brother, if this was the case, why didn’t you just give me the fragments and suffer a meaningless beating?”

“I assumed that you want the principal divine stone... it is the greatest treasure of our clan that has birthed sentience, following countless years of worship—how could we sell it?” the old Daemon Monkey justified, though his tone changed as he took out eight stone fragments of varying sizes. “These are fragments of the Divine Sky-Mending Stone, each of which are priceless in value... but since we’ve had the privilege of meeting, I shall reluctantly part with these and sell them to you, Brother.”

What do you even mean, ‘reluctantly part’?

Jiang He complained even as he sneaked a look at the Divine Sky-Mending Stone fragments.

Including the two-meter-tall fragment which the old Daemon Monkey brought, the largest of the remaining ones was one-meter tall, while the smallest was the size of a melon. Each fragment was also different in shape, and when Jiang He walked up and tried to piece them together, he found that the fragments were incomplete too—portions of them must have been vaporized when the Great Sage broke out from within, or there were some pieces that the Daemon Monkeys of Mount Huaguo did not preserve.

Though each of these divine stone fragments carried faint divinity as well, it was so weak that one would not notice it if one was not properly sensing it.

Hence, Jiang He held up one finger and said, “I’ll only pay this much for these nine Divine Sky-Mending Stone fragments.”

“A hundred thousand superior-grade spirit stones?”

The old Daemon Monkey’s eyes widened, and he shook his head, saying, “These are fragments of the Divine Sky-Mending Stone, a priceless treasure... wouldn’t ten superior-grade spirit stones be a little cheap?”

Jiang He was dumbstruck.

“Why don’t you increase your offer, Brother?”

“I’ll add your mom! What are you, dumb? I meant ten thousand superior-grade spirit stones!”

Jiang He barked furiously. “I’m buying nine of your divine stone fragments with ten thousand superior-grade spirit stones! Are you selling? Spirit Qi has dried up over two thousand years and every spirit stone vein on Earth is exhausted—this is all I can manage.”

There was no lie in that statement.

Any immortal sect, demonic sect, and daemon cultivator would never be able to offer so many superior-grade spirit stones.

Wait, that was not exactly correct...

A more accurate statement would be that even several sects working together would hardly be able to offer so many superior-grade spirit stones. If they could, it meant that Jiang He had not been milking them dry.

On the other hand, it took the old Daemon Monkey a long while to manage a reply. “We can negotiate the price, yes? Brother... you could increase it a little, yes?”

“Ten thousand! Are you selling?!”

“I’ll sell, I’ll sell!”

With a wave of his hand, the old Daemon Monkey pushed all nine stone fragments up to Jiang He, and his aura only withered back to Mahayana after Jiang He paid up ten thousand superior-grade spirit stones.

Jiang He appeared taken aback.

What was that supposed to mean?

Were you afraid I won’t pay up?

Even if I don’t, did you think you could beat me by keeping your full-fledged Heavenly Immortal cultivation?

Be that as it may, the old Daemon Monkey did hold a good standard, having condensed thirty-six Dao. Even so, he was seriously injured and had to revert his cultivation to stay alive, and probably did not cultivate much over the last two thousand years... would he be a match against Jiang He, even with his Heavenly Immortal Dao glowing faintly?

After collecting the nine fragments of the Divine Sky-Mending Stone, Jiang He offered the old Daemon Monkey a fist-palm salute and was about to leave when the old Daemon Monkey asked, “Brother, I have not been out for over two thousand years... but is the world out there lively?”

“When did the immortals return here to the homeworld?”

“Was the Celestial Seal released?”

“Did you hear news about our clan’s Grand King at the Celestial Battlefield?”

Jiang He flashed a pained smile and shook his head at the series of questions, replying, “Brother, I wasn’t lying when I said that I do not belong to any sect. I have never been to the Celestial Battlefield either and wouldn’t know anything aobut that, although the Star Map’s seal has indeed been released, and the immortals are said to be returning.”

“Hoho!”

The old Daemon Monkey sneered and said, “Do you take me for a fool?”

Shaking his head, he became reluctant to talk further with Jiang He. “The trade is complete. Please go home, Brother.”

Moron!

Is there no one who would believe me when I tell the truth?

Jiang He complained. Turning back for a look at the divine stone kept at the center of the grotto-heaven, he turned and flew out, returning to Dumbo, Trumbo, and the others. “Come, we’re going home to farm!”

With Jiang He’s current speed, it would not take him even a brief dozen minutes to fly around Earth. Once he returned home, he went straight inside his farm and immediately planted the nine fragments of the Divine Sky-Mending Stone.

“The divinity on these Divine Sky-Mending Stone fragments is basically nonexistent, though I wonder what wonders would grow after planting them.”

“Hmmm...”

“Actually, I don’t care about wonders. I just want a few fake mountains.”

Right now, the replanted purple bamboo forest was already growing fertilely beside his mansion.

Jiang He had added a shed within the forest and laid out a limestone path connecting the door of the mansion to the shed.

Both the shed and the limestone floor plates were appropriated from Guanyin’s Bodhimanda.

Moreover, Jiang He had also dug a manmade leg as well, a task that could not be simpler with Dumbo and Trumbo since both pets possessed earth-type superpowers. Still, the farm area was a mere 100 Mu and too small, which was why the manmade lake was not that wide.

The mansion, the purple bamboo forest, the manmade lake and the area reserved for a garden and fake mountain added together occupied over forty Mu of land as well.

Naturally, the manmade lake would definitely have to be expanded in the future as well.

It would be too congested to rear hundreds of fishes at such a narrow location.

Of course, the fishes Jiang He planted were extraordinary too. Even the smallest were over a meter long, which he fished from the streams formed from the melting ice beneath Mount Tian. Coupled with the concentrated Spirit Qi inside the farm, the fishes had evolved considerable, and their flesh contained pure spirit energy as well.

Jiang He’s plan was to make a cove beside the manmade lake after the farm was expended.

He would also cover thin sand on the cove, so that his maids and fairy maidens could play beach volleyball in bikinis and the like. He could also get some seafood from the Pacific Ocean such as prawns or crabs, which he could scoop out when he was free to eat.

Still, that would have to wait.

The most pressing matter at hand was creating cultivation manuals.

Jiang He hence walked up to the Elder Tea Tree of Enlightenment, plucked one leaf, and said, “Help me brew a pot of tea, Hu Mei.”

Hu Mei took the leaf and went to work, while Jiang He took out pen and paper, and placed them on the stone table beneath the tree.

He sat on the stone stool and began to think.

“I tread upon the path of sword cultivators before, and I am an immortal swordsman now... should I keep advancing along this path?”

Jiang He was wavering—sword cultivators were certainly powerful, but he had a hard time fully playing out his strengths in that class.

Right now, with his Thunder Dao Form, even his Heavenly Immortal Dao contained the power of thunder. Even his physique was strengthened immensely after consuming the Thunder Dao Fruit, even naturally gaining mastery over the ninth fold of the Nine Heavenly Stars Body Formula.

“Even inferior-grade immortal items could hardly pierce my defenses if I just stood there without resisting... which is why I cannot give up on my physical advantage.”

Should he continue cultivating the path of immortal and physique at once?

What should he choose?

Jiang He kept pondering and only made up his mind when Hu Mei brought him the brewed Elder Tea of Enlightenment. A look of resolve showed on his face and he said quietly, “Only kids choose. I’ll have it all—the path of a cultivator in both sword and physique!”

“If push comes to shove, I’ll just have to work harder at farming!”

As if there was a spring flowing in his mind, Jiang He lifted his pen and was about to go creative, but soon realized he did not know what to write.

He pondered, finishing the entire cup of tea in the process.

Oom!

A Dao aura unfurled around him and an Immortal Dao actually began to condense within his body.

Jiang He could not help closing his eyes, entrapped in the profoundly mysterious realm.

It was only after an hour that he opened his eyes and chuckled sourly. “Isn’t that just nonsense? I’m having an instant enlightenment from just having some tea? I only wanted to create a cultivation technique...”

However, he did not come out empty-handed from that instant enlightenment. Jiang He felt right then that his mind was clear and thoughts flowing freely, with countless ideas appearing in his head with a single thought.

“Yes!”

“Since I would cultivate both physique and immortality, why not fuse both disciplines as one?”

“I would walk the path of Sword Qi and Thunder Dao Form... therefore, I would assume the path of an Immortal Thunderswordsman, with both my Yuan Strength and Sword Qi imbued with the power of thunder... when I cultivate my sword technique, my Sword Qi would refine myself as well.”

Jiang He’s eyes lit up at that. “It is such a terrific idea, though I would have to go into detail on the specific cultivation method and tiering... For one, I am already a full-fledged Heavenly Immortal, so it would be ideal if this cultivation technique starts at Heavenly Immortal. Otherwise, it is going to use up a lot of time and Farm Points if cultivating it beings from Qi Refinist...”

***

Meanwhile, at a massive living planet in a bustling star system far away from Earth—

Ooom!

As teleportation radiance shone, waves of figures swirling with immortal might stepped out of a portal.

These were immortals who had just returned from the Celestial Battlefield, and among them was the Golden Immortal swordsman from the Ten Thousand Swords Sect, holding a Star Map and casting it a few glances while chuckling, “We are now on the Horned Dragon Star, under the jurisdiction of the Three Coves Quadrant. It’s one of the more prosperous planets in the area, so we could rest and reorganize before we depart.”

“Sure.”

Someone smiled and nodded. “The Thee Coves Quadrant is the dragons’ domain and those dragons hold strong ties with our homeworld, so we don’t have to worry about being singled out. They also possess great stores of rare treasures that you could buy and bring home to the juniors in your respective sects too.”

On the other hand, the Immortal Fox of Green Hill snorted coolly and said, “Rest all you want. I’ll be going ahead.”

With that, he led the four True Immortals and dozen or so Heavenly Immortals of his sect, and left quickly through the portal.

Someone frowned and chided quietly with a sneer, “The Foxes of Green Hill are ever arrogant.”

“It’s only natural, since they have a direct line to the Divine Ones.”

“Bleh. Aren’t they just servants serving beneath the Divine Ones?”

Each of the immortals threw out some subtle insults, while the elderly man from the Ten Thousand Swords Sect smiled. “It’s understandable that they are a little eager to get home after being more than two thousand years away... Moreover, that old thing was totally humiliated and had been scowling along our entire journey after the chief general from the Sect of Enlightenment gave him a thorough beating, so it’s nice to part ways with him.”

“By the way, aren’t you a Scale Dragon, Old White? There are a lot of dragons around here at the Three Coves Star... why don’t we find ourselves some young dragon gals to play with?”

The one addressed as Old White happened to be the Scale Dragons’ Golden Immortal, and he chuckled. “Oh, that’s a trifle. Everyone, please wait while I send someone to ask around and find out where are the recreational spots on this planet.”

***

At the same time, the Immortal Foxes of Green Hill had already teleported to another planet.

One of the Immortal Foxes appeared puzzled and asked, “Elder, why are we in such a hurry?”

The old fox smiled cunningly and said, “Those fools only care about enjoying themselves, and don’t know that the revival in our homeworld harkens the rebirth of the immortal path. Now is the best timing to spread our teachings and strengthen our destinies, and we would certainly claim decisive opportunity since we are returning to the homeworld days ahead of them. The old founder had spoken to me before our return as well, that I shall reopen the mountain gates of Green Hill, recruiting disciples and teaching them our immortal arts. There shall be education for everyone, irrespective of background, so we would be recruiting from other daemon tribes or even humans.”

At those words, irrepressible flashes of wisdom appeared on the old fox’s face.

Inwardly, he was thinking...

I wonder what has become of Green Hill now.

Was the boulder he often played around still there? Were the young ones of his clan lively?

Hmmm...

“Back then, I had developed a cultivation technique that I kept in the chamber of our clan’s Dao collections... I wonder if there are many young ones who cultivated it, and if fate allows, I could accept a disciple...”

The old fox became even more keen on getting home at that thought, exclaiming, “Everyone, hurry along as fast as you can. We will reach our homeworld in three days at most, and we would have all the time to rest then!”

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