Chapter 58.2
TW: child abuse, homophobia, mentions of suicide, suicide ideation
Editor: yummers
Souls that died by suicide were required by law to immediately head to the Underworld. This was meant to protect both the souls and others.
They committed suicide because they wanted to leave this world. After the World’s consciousness perceived this, it would subconsciously reject them after they turned into souls.
Every additional second here was sheer torture for them.
“Did you agree?”
“How can I agree to something that hasn’t happened yet?”
The demon sucked the milk tea from the straw in short sips. He smirked when he saw how serious Meng Qing was. “But I will when it happens.”
“A year of his life for keeping that soul for a day. It’s a pretty sweet deal.”
The look on the young cultivator’s face became even more serious.
“One’s lifespan is decided by Heaven. It’s inherently wrong for you to trade it, not to mention that it would be like making that soul walk on knives if you prevent it from leaving the human realm. Even if it stays, it wouldn’t be grateful to that person.”
Shi Qing, “That’s not necessarily true.”
Meng Qing was confident. “It is.”
He spoke very seriously, “I once saw a soul that died by suicide but was trapped here because of an artifact. Only three days was enough for it to be driven mad by the constant pain. Before we could exorcise it, it dissipated.”
Shi Qing, “Little cultivator, not every soul that dies by suicide is like the one you met.”
Meng Qing was about to say more when he suddenly paused and directed a sharp look to the school entrance.
“What a strong presence of death energy.”
Shi Qing stroked his chin. A pair of light-red eyes glanced over as well.
The newly dead all radiated death energy. The more intense it was, the more recently they had died.
Since they had both sensed it at the same time, it was all but confirmed that the time of death was less than an hour ago.
The demon king took another sip of milk tea and waggled his eyebrows at Meng Qing. He put on his sunglasses and looked at the soul that was walking towards the student.
“Looks like he’s the soul in question.”
He stood up and held out his hand to Meng Qing and nodded towards the school. “Come on, let’s go check it out.”
The young cultivator stood up silently, not even looking at Shi Qing’s outstretched hand.
Shi Qing shrugged. “Little cultivator, Master commands you to take my hand.”
“Demon! Is this the only trick you know how to use?! Shameless!”
Meng Qing could only curse as he watched his hand move by itself towards the demon king.
Shi Qing took the young cultivator’s hand and scratched his palm. He lifted his sunglasses to his eyebrows with his other hand, revealing a pair of beautiful eyes.
“Although it’s the only thing I can do to you, it’s pretty effective, wouldn’t you say?”
Meng Qing’s angry face reddened even more.
His face hadn’t been calm ever since he met with Shi Qing.
“Demon! You...”
“I know, I know. I’m shameless, right?”
Shi Qing put down his sunglasses and took Meng Qing’s hand, quite smug as he let the little cultivator lean towards him.
“You are my fated companion. I can certainly forgive a little name calling from you.”
“You&#k2026;”
The demon king smiled. “Alright, Master is now giving you a rule. In the future, every time you call me a demon or some variation of that, you have to kiss me afterwards. To be in effect indefinitely.”
Meng Qing, “......”
He looked at the demon king with annoyance, but he was unable to think of any words to replace it. Therefore, he could only sullenly shut his mouth and act like he was mute.
But Shi Qing didn’t plan to let him off so easily.
“Why aren’t you talking anymore?”
“Little cultivator? Meng Qing? Sweetie? Darling?”
Meng Qing couldn’t take it anymore. He stopped walking and roared at Shi Qing, “Shut up demon!”
As soon as the words left his mouth, he realized his mistake. He covered his mouth and stared straight at Shi Qing.
Shi Qing turned his head and gestured to his cheek. “Come on.”
Meng Qing, “......”
He could only watch as his body leaned in and brushed against the demon’s white and tender cheek like a dragonfly skimming over water.
Even though he quickly withdrew after 0.01 seconds, the young cultivator’s face still flushed an even darker shade of red.
If it was light red before, it was bright red now.
He kept wiping his lips with the back of his hand, his face full of shame and indignation. His mouth muttered the words, “You’re shameless”, over and over again.
***
While they were “flirting”, the atmosphere between the two young boys in front of the school also seemed to be pretty good.
A high school student in a uniform was carrying a backpack as he stood patiently for the person he was waiting for to arrive. He ran to greet them with joyful eyes along with a cheerful greeting, but stopped a couple of steps away and nervously rubbed the shoulder straps of his backpack.
“Mi Lang, you came to school today. Is everything okay with your parents then?”
Mi Lang was the student walking this way. His face was pale with delicate features. When he heard his boyfriend’s words, he shook his head slightly and forced himself to smile.
“Everything’s fine.”
“Really?” Chen Zeyu let out a sigh of relief. A sunny smile reappeared on his face as he expressed his relief, “They wouldn’t let me in before when I went to look for you. I thought you were going to be transferred to another school.”
Chen Zeyu and Mi Lang were both in high school and top students in the same class. There was one more thing they had in common: they both had no feelings for girls.
After confessing their feelings to each other, they smoothly entered into a relationship.
Their romance lasted a year. It didn’t slowly fade away as the ones between teenagers usually did. Instead, it was more like a wine stored in a cellar, becoming more mellow and tasteful with age.
They began to meticulously plan their future together, discussing things like going to the same university to study the same major, finding a job together after graduation, and renting an apartment together.
They even thought about going to an orphanage to adopt a child when the time was right.
But teenage fondness was hard to keep hidden. Even though they tried their best, their relationship was eventually discovered by others.
Gossip, slander, abuse, and rumors of all kinds followed.
Mi Lang was directly locked up by his family and forbidden to go back to school while they prepared to transfer him.
On the other hand, Chen Zeyu was beaten brutally by his father with a stick to force him to give up on this relationship.
He was hit until he couldn’t move from his bed, but he still clenched his teeth and refused to give up until the seventh day, when his parents gave in and let him go back to school.
There was no news from Mi Lang. Even though Chen Zeyu went to look for him many times, he was always kicked out before he could even catch a glimpse of him.
Chen Zeyu had no choice but to wait outside every day before school, hoping that Mi Lang would come.
He was beginning to lose all hope after waiting for so long.
Unexpectedly, the one he waited for came today.
When he found out that Mi Lang was fine, this cheerful teen was as happy as a little bird. He skipped around his boyfriend, still carrying his backpack.
“I’m so glad that you’re okay. This would’ve happened sooner or later. Now we don’t have to be afraid of people finding out anymore.”
“Some people are bound to gossip, so don’t be afraid! Their words can’t hurt us! We’ll stick to our plan until we get into university and get out of here.”
Mi Lang’s pale face continued to wear a smile as Chen Zeyu spoke. His eyes were filled with tenderness as he looked at his optimistic boyfriend.
He didn’t move when Chen Zeyu reached out to pull him into the school. Instead he asked, “Zeyu, what do you think our future is like?”
“Our future huh...”
Chen Zeyu didn’t know why Mi Lang would suddenly ask this question, but he answered very quickly.
“We should be engineers then with our house. We...we might have a mortgage, but it’s fine! It wouldn’t be too stressful for the two of us to pay it off! And when we’re old enough, we’ll adopt a little baby, boy or girl, and raise them well. They’ll call me ‘big daddy’ and you ‘little daddy’ because I’m three months older than you.”
“Right!” Chen Zeyu clapped his hands, his face full of yearning for the future. “We will definitely have a wedding in the future! Although we can’t get a license now, everyone has a wedding when they get married! There’s no big problems anymore with my parents, so we’ll just slowly work on your parents.”
“When the time comes, there has to be a priest, the kind that stands between the two of us and says cough cough... “Chen Zeyu coughed a few times and deliberately lowered his voice to imitate a priest.
“Mr. Chen Zeyu, do you take Mr. Mi Lang as your lifelong companion?”
Mi Lang stared at his vibrant boyfriend with a hint of yearning in his eyes and a pale face. He whispered, “I do.”
Chen Zeyu was stunned, then he smiled and went to pat Mi Lang’s shoulder. “I know you’re willing, I feel the...”
His voice trailed off after his hand slipped through Mi Lang’s body. He froze.
His gentle boyfriend stood in front of him, unmoving. “I’m sorry for leaving you behind.”
Chen Zeyu blankly stared at his boyfriend as he faded away.
He already knew it deep down inside, but he refused to admit it. “Mi Lang, wait, how did it come to this? Yes, yes, I must be dreaming. This is all a dream.”
He looked down at his hands and kept muttering to himself, “It’s a dream, it’s a dream...”
“I’m sorry...”
Mi Lang looked at the stricken Chen Zeyu and continued to apologize.
“I’m sorry Zeyu, I couldn’t endure any longer. They kept yelling at me, saying that I was a disgrace to the family. All my relatives came to tell me that I was sick. I was locked up in the house and I couldn’t go anywhere. All I could do was sit there and listen to them talk outside.”
“They said that I was sick, that they were going to lock me up in a mental hospital. They said that I was useless, and that all the effort spent to raise me had been wasted. Even my parents said that they wished I had never been born. I was so afraid. I was afraid that I would be sent to a mental hospital. I was afraid that I would be treated like a sick person. I couldn’t do anything all day. I could only sit there and listen to them talk. And I couldn’t sleep at night. It was as if everyone was talking about me, everyone thought that I was sick...”
Chen Zeyu was now in hysterics. He shook his head and cried too.
“We’re not sick because this isn’t a disease! We were born this way! We’re the same as everyone else...”
“I’m sorry. Sorry that I’m so weak. I was afraid of the way they looked at me. I was afraid that they would send me to a mental hospital, I was afraid of how the neighbourhood auntie who used to be so nice to me pulled her granddaughter away as soon as she saw me. I know I’m not sick, but everyone else thinks I’m sick. They want to cure me, but I don’t want to be cured even if it’s possible. I just couldn’t...”
Chen Zeyu subconsciously went forward to catch his collapsing boyfriend and comfort him, but there was nothing to hold. He took a dazed step back, watching as the figure before him became more transparent by the second.
Finally, a realization hit him.
He shouted, “Mi Lang!”
“What have you done to yourself?!”
Mi Lang looked at Chen Zeyu, an endless abyss of sadness within his eyes.
“Last night, I quietly opened the door, climbed up to the rooftop, and jumped.”
“I feel so free now...”
He seemed distant, as if he had recalled the memories of last night when his parents were arguing about which mental institution they should send him to as they both blamed each other for not taking proper care of him, causing him to become a pervert.
A pervert—
Was he already a pervert in their minds?
He hasn’t had a good night’s sleep in a long time. At first, he wanted to sleep, but his parents took turns watching him and shaking him awake every time he closed his eyes, forcing him to admit he was sick.
And then one day he just couldn’t sleep anymore.
As soon as he closed his eyes, it was as if someone around him was constantly talking to him.
Trash—
Pervert—
Disgusting gay—
When he jumped from the rooftop, when he crashed against the ground, all those voices faded away.
It was...so freeing.
But soon after the relief came regret.
Not for giving up his life, but for leaving Chen Zeyu behind to suffer alone.
“I’m sorry...” he repeated for the umpteenth time. “I’m really sorry...”
“I really...I really did want to marry you and have a wedding with you. Sorry...”
He slowly disappeared.
This young life that had yet to bloom was crushed at the age where it should’ve been the most lively and bright.
Leaving behind his equally young boyfriend in a dazed heap on the ground. His hands reached helplessly out to grasp someone that was no longer here.
“Mi Lang...”
“Mi Lang? Mi Lang?”
He looked around the deserted school entrance and shook his head in denial. “This is a dream. This must be a dream...”
That must be it! He’s dreaming!
This isn’t real. Mi Lang must still be alive and well at home. This isn’t real.
He just needed to repeat it until it came true.
Yet there was something broken in his dull, blank eyes.
Not far behind him, the demon king took Meng Qing’s hand and asked him, “Do you still think this deal shouldn’t be made?”
Meng Qing was silent.
Only half a moment later did he say, “This one was too narrow minded before. It doesn’t matter what gender a person likes. It’s the same in the end.”
Shi Qing grasped his hand. “That’s right. Just like you and I and them. It’s all the same.”
Meng Qing surprisingly didn’t try to struggle this time. He just asked, “But what can they do in just one day?”
One day, not counting the night, was only twelve hours in total.
Shi Qing looked at the boy who was half-kneeling on the ground, his entire body trembling as he was unable to support himself.
“They’ll have a wedding.”
“The wedding of their dreams that can never be.”
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