Evil God Average

Volume 3, Chapter 1 – A Dangerous Evil God Statue

This is a story that takes place while the Black Rose Mansion was still being built.

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One day, the Pope called me out to the side of the Evil God Temple.

In other words… where a certain massive statue was being built. A massive statue that boasted the same five-story height as the temple, and that happened to look just like me.

Right now it was being completely covered in cloth so you couldn’t see inside, but once you removed the cloth, there’s a good chance its dignity could even be seen from town.

…This guy just stirs up trouble.

“Well then, Anri-sama. Please have a look at the completed statue,” said the Pope in gorgeous priests clothes, as he gripped the corner of the cloth with one hand.

The reason I was called out here today was because he wanted me to be the first to see it finished.

To be honest, I get the feeling that it should be the divine “me” that was called out here, but I guess I’m here as the representative since it would be insane to call out a god.

Really, I wanted to run, but since I owed him a favour for helping me with the house, I really couldn’t refuse. That’s why, unwilling though I was, I forced myself to come.

“Now then, I shall unveil the cloth! This is the moment that the world will fall on its knees to the glory of our god’s divine form!”

Nobody is kneeling to anything.

I couldn’t help but comment in my mind, but the Pope proudly unveiled it all the same. The white cloth fluttered in the air and exposed the giant statue to the light of day.

On a pedestal of about a metre tall stood a collossal bronze figure.

The form of the deity worshipped in this nation――in other words, me――stood as a massive bronze statue, reproduced so faithfully that an observer could see glimpses of the obsession that went into its creation.

The figure was wearing the same black death rose dress that I was still wearing, and it was so realistic to behold that it seemed like not even a crease had been overlooked.

…And it was extremely embarrassing. Thank goodness I wore a mask.

“How is it, Anri-sama?”

I found the Pope staring my way with sparkling eyes.

I know that he really wants to know. After all, he’s the one who came up with the thing. But his enthusiasm is really troubling.

I could feel my face cramping up, but at the very least I couldn’t find fault with the statue itself.

It was actually so flawless that I found myself wishing he would direct his talents somewhere less useless.

What’s worse was that he was managing the country properly, so it made it all the harder to complain about this.

But well, since it really was well done, I decided to give him a reply… or so I was thinking, when I suddenly noticed one problem.

“? Anri-sama? Is something the matter?”

“There’s something I wanna check.”

“?”

The Pope stared at me in confusion, but I ignored him and approached the statue.

What I wanted to check was none other than the dress that this statue, this Evil God Statue, was wearing. Ah, but I don’t mean that the dress itself looked wrong.

The problem went the other way.

I was worried because it was so similar to my real one.

The black death rose dress that I was wearing was sleeveless and jet black, with a rose pattern at its breast.

It was originally a normal dress, but my divine protection dyed it black.

Naturally its defensive power and resistances increased by shocking amounts too, but there was one last thing that changed about it.

What was dangerous about it, was the design.

There was a pretty deep slit cut into the skirt portion of the dress, and you could see my legs peeping through it. If I wasn’t careful, you’d get a shot of my panties too.

And because of that same divine protection, even my underwear had changed to something dangerous.

So dangerous that parts underwear were made to cover were laid bare instead. Definitely not something I could ever let people see.

And so, you can see what I was worried about.

The dress was perfectly replicated, and the slit was alive and well.

Since it’s a statue I’m not really sure if it counts as showing skin, but the point was that you could definitely see its legs.

Well, that much could still be considered tame.

I mean, it’s not as tame as I’d like, but let’s leave that for now.

The real problem was what lay above it.

It can’t be that he actually replicated even my underwear, right? If he did, the problem would change to how on earth he saw it, but anyway, the point is, looking at the way the statue was made, you would expect the underwear to be done too.

Feeling equal parts anxiety and curiosity, I walked up to its feet and looked right up.

Looking up at it like this really drove in how huge it was.

Because of how big just everything about it was, you could even climb in through the slit.

Uh, no? I won’t though.

Only, even if you didn’t climb in, as long as you stood right next to it, it was a simply matter to peer in.

…Uwah.

What filled my vision as I looked upwards was a completely realistic upskirt. And although they were different to what I had on, the panties were still incredibly risqué.

What on earth was he thinking when he decided to have the Evil God Statue wear these? I honestly wanted to question “Why! Why! Why!” at him for an hour.

But well, it was obvious that whatever answer he gave would just confuse me more, so I decided I didn’t want to ask after all.

But wow, there weren’t any people here right now, so it was all well and good, but did this mean heaps of people were going to see this?

That was a bit of a… or rather, a huge embarrassment.

I mean, it was just a statue so it wasn’t like they were actually looking up my skirt.

I knew that.

I knew that, but it was just so realistic that it felt like my upskirt was being displayed to the world.

“Is there anything wrong with it?”

“…………”

I couldn’t help but stare when he asked me that again.

But as usual, he showed no signs of flinching from my mystic eyes. Not only that, he didn’t even seem to question my resentful gaze, and simply tilted his head in confusion.

Damned pervert.

But well, even if I call him that, he didn’t see me as a woman at all.

It’s kinda rough to say this about myself, but I already knew that I had turned into a being way beyond that to him.

You could say that the way he saw me was as safe as things got.

But that just made it completely puzzling that he would choose such a thing. It was a bit scary to ask, but I couldn’t help myself.

“Why, did you choose this kind of underwear?”

“Huh? Underwear… you ask?”

I asked him without beating around the bush, and after giving me a blank look, he replied,

“Naturally I could not ask you to model for it yourself, Anri-sama…”

Well yeah. Modelling is a pain, and even if I did do it, there’s no way I’d let you peek up my skirt.

“And so because it could not be helped, I consulted your esteemed friend, Leonora-sama, on what kind of design would be best.”

LEONORAAAAAAAAAAAAA!?

What on earth have you done.

No, I mean, it’s true that my underwear is outrageous, and she knows that too. So well, maybe you could say that she was already picking a modest design for me, but to begin with it’s not like I wear these types of things because I want to, and she should know that too!

Could it be that this is revenge because I forgot to dispel the cursed Tena doll…?

Ah, I mean, well, I do feel sorry about that, but…

“Is there some problem about the design of the underwear?”

“…It’s embarrassing to have people see.”

“Hah…”

I meant to object, but considering his half-hearted reply, I wasn’t sure if I got the point across.

“It is my humble opinion that there is nothing to be embarrassed about at all, but may I ask what the problem is?”

Considering his serious expression, apparently he wasn’t kidding.

I guess he really didn’t see me as a woman.

But if I didn’t make myself extremely clear, statue or not, there was a good chance that I was going to suffer the torture of having a giant upskirt view of me displayed to the masses.

But it was already completed, so it would probably be difficult to close up the slit, or build a more modest statue.

So at the very least, I wanted to avoid people peeking in from up close.

“I don’t want people too close to it.”

“!? I see. You certainly are an esteemed personage. It would not do to have people come too close.”

That wasn’t exactly what I meant, but well, good enough.

“Build a fence around the thing, and please don’t let people near its feet.”

“I understand. I shall immediately set out to do so.”

“Please.”

With that, the Pope bowed reverently to me, before hurriedly running off somewhere.

Anyway, with a fence in place, at least they wouldn’t be looking straight up at it. I guess that’s good enough.

But hm, since I may as well, perhaps I should make sure he builds it right.

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