The Defense Against the Dark Arts class professor’s office.
The room looked gray and dull, without much bright light. Remus Lupin sat quietly on the sofa, the wolfsbane potion constantly suppressing his system, like some kind of ghastly mental being extracting his physical strength little by little.
The full moon had not yet arrived, but he is already exhausted.
“Grrr~”
The kettle in the corner boiled, jumping and spewing out large streams of steam, and Lupin dragged his body up, he tries not to use magic before or after the full moon, and after two minutes, he made himself a cup of tea.
Tossing the teabag into the dustbin, white vapour wafted from the spot above the cup, and Lupin’s eyes glistened through the dimness.
“Sirius ….”
He had always been an emotionally introverted person, rarely displaying his true emotions. But with both physical and mental exhaustion, it is inevitable that his mood falls into a persistent slump. He found himself thinking back to this man once again.
The photo on the wanted notice did not show his original face at all, and Lupin always subconsciously brought the young Sirius into it, which made his feelings more complicated and sad.
“Should I reveal Sirius’s Animagus to Dumbledore?”
This question haunted him for a long time, but he could not muster the courage to admit to Dumbledore: he had betrayed his trust as a student, not only left the Shrieking Shack but also following the three people to wander around …
Dumbledore’s trust is extremely important to him, when he was a child, it was Dumbledore who came into his home and convinced his father and mother to accept his admission to Hogwarts. For a year or two, Dumbledore or Madam Pomfrey accompanied him in his transformation, and then he grew older and convinced Dumbledore to allow him to complete the full moon transformation independently.
The chains in the Shrieking Shack were very strong, which was one of the reasons he mentioned it.
Dumbledore agreed with limited exception, and he set up the rule that Madam Pomfrey would lead him through the transformation, but would not keep an eye on him, and would occasionally let him go to the Shrieking Shack alone.
He carefully maintained the secret, although as early as the second year, he was discovered by two keen guys, and then the number of people who knew he was a werewolf expanded to six: Dumbledore, Madam Pomfrey, Professor McGonagall, James, Peter, and – Sirius.
Once, James had a sudden idea of learning Animagus because werewolves are only dangerous to people, and James thought he could become an animal to accompany him. The idea was immediately supported by Sirius, and for some time, their enthusiasm was high.
He didn’t care too much at the time, instead, he was ‘happy’ to be accompanied by his friends, but still, he talked about how advanced Animagus is, and how many wizards have failed before and after a century, with less than two lines of names on the paper for those who finally succeeded.
“I love your cold humour, Lupin,” James said to him at that time.
In the fifth year, things changed. The first full moon after he returned from holiday, he locked himself up in the shrieking shack as usual – he had got very good at it – but when the full moon passed, and he recovered a little, he opened his eyes and saw two large animals.
It was a large black dog and a stag, and to his dazzled surprise, they turned into two familiar fellows, James and Sirius. They grinned at him, “We’ve been keeping this from you all summer just to see your surprised face.”
It was hard to describe his feelings at the time, happy and upset – they had got themselves all bruised up trying to pass the whomping Willow – and even a little grumpy, what if he had hurt them? But looking at their smiles, he compromised once again.
After another two months, with the help of James and Sirius, Peter also finally made it, with their company, he calmed down a lot in the werewolf state, not always without reason, probably because both James and Sirius Animagus can suppress the werewolf, and no one to stimulate him to frenzy.
They set out on an adventure. A werewolf and a few animals running around in the dark! Looking back now, Lupin is still puzzled by his youthful ignorance, but at the time they took the incident as a joke and were smug about it …
He could not help but feel guilty – for breaking the safety code set by Headmaster Dumbledore with his own hands, and despite his inner turmoil for a long time, he did not refuse to participate in the next adventure that they fixed.
In the office, the tea is already cold.
Lupin thought to himself: at the right time, I will tell Dumbledore everything, including his own hypocrisy and cowardice. He said to himself, and then thought with self-loathing, come on, you should have told Dumbledore long ago when Sirius tried to break into the castle.
But he subconsciously postponed the decision again and again, like an ostrich, naively believed that Sirius had been obstructed and that he would never appear again.
“Maybe he learned the evil dark magic from Voldemort … but Hogwarts has Dumbledore, he won’t succeed.”
Lupin revealed an expression of self-loathing as he picked up his cup and poured the cold tea into his stomach.
He thought of Neville and Harry, as he subconsciously focused on them. His attitude toward Neville was more of pity; his parents had been his comrades in arms, and although they hadn’t interacted much, the Longbottom’s were friendly people.
He saw at once the timid character of Neville, he hoped that Neville could overcome his fears, but Snape’s retort seemed to make the boy suffer more cowardly, and he wondered if his several reassurances had produced any effect.
Harry, on the other hand, he is more like his own son and nephew … although he hides this affection well.
By the way, he still has to teach Harry the Patronus Charm, Lupin cheered up a bit, he should find a boggart, he knows a lot about this creature, which comes from the bedtime stories he heard as a child – his father is “an expert on non-human spiritual phenomena” and knows all about mischievous ghosts, boggart and other types of ghosts.
Even his father and mother bonded due to a wild boggart …
Lupin suddenly thought, Harry will certainly ask about his parents, when the time comes, how much should he reveal? And Sirius, it seemed that the more he said, the more wrong it would become.
“Knock…knock.”
A low knock on the door interrupted Lupin’s thoughts, and he pushed it open to see Dumbledore standing outside the door.
“Dumbledore – what brings you here?” Lupin asked in surprise.
Dumbledore said in a deep voice: “Bad news, Sirius Black took advantage of Harry and his friends’ visit to Hagrid to sneak up on them.”
“What!” Lupin’s eyes widened, and his mind went dizzy, “Harry – are they all right?”
“Almost, almost he did, Remus.” Dumbledore said. “Harry’s best friend is lying in the hospital ward right now, and there’s no guarantee when the next attack will happen.”
Lupin held onto the door frame and seemed to lose all his strength. After a while, he said dismally, “I will tell you everything I know, Professor Dumbledore, including Black’s secret, including the lies I have told you … I only hope that you will listen to the story fully and not leave in the middle because of anger.”
“That’s exactly what I came to see you about, Remus,” Dumbledore said calmly.
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