Chapter 745: A Hurdle In Her Heart
Sitting inside the living hall of the Li Manor, General Li had a blank face.
It took him a long time to raise his head and look at Gu Li who seemed to be at lack of knowing what to do.
Li Rui had just finished telling her father everything and it was for the first time Gu Li came to know of things from her point of view.
At that time when she was there in the forest with him and her master had told him that she came from an influential family and hence she couldn't stay with him, he had never imagined that Li Rui would be a girl from a clan that was greatly respected by every person of Xin.
Scratching that…he had never even known that she was not a boy until a few weeks ago.
Still he had thought that her family was too careless to not care about her. Otherwise, how was he able to find her alone in such a dangerous situation?
Today, too, Gu Li thought the same.
Her father was not even aware of anything until today.
Is that how a father took care of his daughter?
Gu Li had many things to say but he didn't want to do anything to upset Li Rui who seemed t respect her father a lot.
General Li finally looked at his daughter again.
His voice was slightly heavy as he said with still a blank face.
"Rui, you never told me anything."
What could Li Rui say in response to such a question! So she lowered her head.
However, this kind of response only fueled General Li's anger.
The middle-aged General suddenly stood up from the couch he was seated on and said in a loud voice.
"Is that the answer you have, Rui? What if something had went wrong? I trusted you and hence sent you out whenever you wanted. However, you hid such a big thing from me. You stayed with Youxio shadow guards for a whole month! Do you even know what could have happened if someone had come to know of it? What if they had …"
…taken you away with them.
General Li suddenly stopped speaking. He couldn't finish his words, His throat suddenly felt very heavy.
Until now, he had thought that he had protected his daughter well.
In the process, it was true that he had sacrificed very genuinely hearted and loyal people, however, General Li thought that as long as Li Rui was safe, nothing mattered.
He had married her daughter to a man who hated her from the core of his heart, again because he thought that she would stay alive and no one who wanted to harm her would be able to reach her.
As he thought all this, General Li couldn't help but ask his daughter
"You…were you attacked again after that?"
Li Rui was silent for a long time.
She had this weakness.
She could hide things from her father but she felt very guilty to lie after Li Zhan's death. After Li Zhan's death, she had never even tried to force him to grant her something.
She would just tell him that she wanted to learn medicine from this master. If he allowed her that was good and if he didn't then it was also good.
She never disobeyed because she was afraid that her disobedience would again cost her the life of someone innocent as it did in Li Zhan's matter.
However, when he allowed her to leave Li Manor for the first time and go to Master Wong and learn medicine, she felt peaceful.
The peace that had left her after Li Zhan's death, she found to some extent when she was out of Li Manor.
The walls of Li Manor, every corner of Li Manor reminded her of Li Zhan.
In Li Manor, the horrible dreams of that day would always surround her but when she was in the village, there were sometimes nights when she was able to sleep peacefully. Though such nights were rare, Li Rui cherished that.
And hence she decided not to tell anything her father so that the little bit of peace she found outside would not be snatched.
However, now that he asked her on his own, she couldn't lie.
"Yes"
She whispered in a low voice. Her head was still lowered.
General Li tried very hard to stay calm.
"So you knew from the start about the attacks?"
When Li Rui nodded her head, a bitter chuckle still escaped his lips. Here he had thought that she never knew anything about those attacks.
So she knew.
When Li Rui heard the chuckle from her father, she raised her head to look at him. Though her face was calm, she felt upset because she thought that her father was angry.
"Father, Rui…"
She was about to apologize when General Li interrupted her and asked
"Here I thought that my daughter was always honest to me. Just how many things you have hidden from me, Rui?"
Perhaps it was the cold expression on her father's face or the words he said, however, Li Rui's expression changed suddenly.
The guilt was no longer there and she suddenly smiled…a smile that didn't have any humor.
"Why, Father? Just because I hid something you feel betrayed. What should I feel on seeing that you hide so many things from me and even say that on my face?"
General Li's face went blank suddenly.
However, Li Rui was not finished.
"Rui had always respected Father's wish and never tried to find out what Father wants to hide. Father should also respect Rui's wishes."
Finishing her words, Li Rui stood up from the couch and then left from there.
Xi Ying who had been controlling himself until now finally found the chance to speak.
He had been just standing beside Li Rui, however, his hand was held by his wife. He knew that she didn't want him to interfere and hence he did so.
However, now that she was not here he was not going to do the same. Though he was satisfied with her response, he will still not let go of this matter so easily.
"General Li, it is quite ridiculous that you still feel that you have the right to scold Rui."
In fact, Gu Li felt the same.
Though he didn't know everything, in his eyes, Li Rui's father was already very careless. Especially, when she had said that she had spent the most peaceful days of her childhood while living with Youxio, he had asked himself what kind of life she had at her home.
And hence, his dissatisfaction with Li Clan emerged from a lot of things…especially from how General Li scolded Li Rui today.
Xi Ying had expected General Li to argue with him.
Hence he was startled when General Li raised his head to look at him and said in a slightly choking voice.
"I know now."
And with these words, General Li also left the living room.
.
.
.
When Xi Ying went back to the courtyard, he didn't find Li Rui there.
He searched the whole courtyard and couldn't help but feel anxious.
"An Ju!"
Xi Ying shouted without any worry to maintain his calm.
By the time he was outside the courtyard, An Ju had appeared in front of him. Outside the courtyard, Gu Li was also standing with a worried expression on his face.
"Where is Rui?"
Xi Ying asked An Ju.
When the latter answered him, he immediately used Qingqong and flew to the part of Li Manor where Li Rui was.
Gu Li followed him silently.
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Li Rui was seated in front of Li Zhan's grave.
When Xi Ying stepped down on the ground, his heart shook with grief seeing the petite back of his wife in the evening of cold winter.
She looked so alone and far away from him.
Li Rui was not startled when a pair of arms suddenly surrounded her waist and she was pulled back slightly.
Her back rested on the strong chest of Xi Ying bringing her the warmth she really needed at this moment.
When Gu Li came and saw this scene, he didn't feel wise to interrupt them and silently left.
They just stay there with each other.
Li Rui's eyes were on Li Zhan's grave. Li Zhan was the hurdle that she didn't know if she will ever be able to cross in her life ever.
Li Hua had tried to make her understand many times and she also knew that Li Zhan would never blame her but every time she would think of Li Zhan, her heart would be torn into pieces remembering that day of the Imperial banquet.
A tear suddenly slid down Li Rui's eyes.
Xi Ying was startled. He wiped it gently with his finger, however, the tears continued.
When she suddenly turned around and hid her face in his chest, he didn't stop her.
Though her sobs were silent, her shoulders shook continuously.
Xi Ying's eyes were red. Every sob sliced his heart like a knife. However, he could only pat her back gently or engulf her in his arms while whispering to her continuously that 'everything is alright'.
Because that was the only way of comforting he knew.
Because his mother also used to comfort him like that.
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