Azief was never a perfect man. That was something he believe about himself. He is broken and he deserve broken things.
When he saw Sofia, he recognizes a girl that is the same ilk as him. Broken and damaged.
But the more he got to know her, the more he sees that this woman that she thought were broken is nothing like him
She is damaged and broken yet she keeps putting herself back up together. There is something enchanting about such strength that could not be quantify.
He admires that strength and he wishes that the him of the past also had that kind of strength. She was something he is not.
And then there is Katarina.
That woman is much more than just a pretty face. She has never seen a woman that strong before in his life.
She faced life valiantly even when life keep throwing thing at her.
Katarina is a woman beaten by life repeatedly, and Azief could imagine how many times she was beat down and stomp hard by this existence called life.
She is someone who had half of her life trapped under an alcoholic father.
She was abused by life and by society and by family. Azief notices that he has a type when he falls in love with Katarina.
Sofia was like that, and Katarina was also like that. He is attracted to broken things. But just like Sofia, he found out that life hasn’t broken Katarina.
And probably they never could.
Just like Sofia, Katarina, despite evidence to the contrary, even during that dark times, she believes that she would get her happy ending.
And that is the most impressive thing.
She believes…. despite of it all.
When he heard her story, he was in tears, he just couldn’t understand how could she believe that things would get better when all the things she had experience shows her that nothing could be farther than the truth?
Was it some kind of delusion to protect herself? Or was it just a way to cope with it all?
She said even in the darkest day, when winter came and it was so cold and she shivers in that dark room with wounds all over her body, she believes in it, because no one else believes in it.
No one believes that she will make it out alright so she chose to believe in it.
She refuses to be changed by her father. If her father chooses darkness, she would choose light and she would rather die than not believe in it.
He could not understand because he always falls down….and he never try to get back up.
He lied down and think about the pain and that is all he thinks about. The pain and whining about it, never facing the real problem head on.
He did not believe in hopes, in dreams, in friendship and in love because all of those things, they all betrayed him.
Sometimes, he asks whether it those thing that betrayed him or was it he that betrayed them?
What would happen if he did not give up? What would happen if he keeps believing and keeping the faith alive?
What if he ignores all those words that said he will fail and that he will regret it?
Would he be more?
Something more than he is?
There is always this darkness inside him that he did not want anyone to see. He did not want Sofia to see it and he did not want Katarina to see it.
That darkness is a bundle of insecurity, of problems that was not solved in the past, ugly emotions that he did not want to burden them with.
But sometimes it came out. It came out when he saw Raymond holding Sofia hands. It came out when he couldn’t choose between the two.
And it came out each time when winter came and snows fall down. That darkness is still very much alive
And he is still broken. Even after all this time
Everyone only saw the sides he wanted them to see. The reliable side of Death Monarch. The strong and invincible Death Monarch, cold, calm and collected.
But that darkness always lurks in his heart. But this one year he had seen and experience things that made him think hard about the matters of his life and his past.
He sighed and then he smiles. He did not know whether that smile came out because he is happy or he is relieved or he is feeling wistful. Maybe, this time he s miles just because.
What he remembers most is pain. And for some reason he did not hate it. Not because he likes pain per se, but because that pain made him remember something.
That he still could get hurt.
When he walks that Thirteen Steps of the Supremacy Stairway, the pain while it was painful was also something that is refreshing.
He does not like pain. Instead he had always hated it
But sometimes pain reminded him things he could not be reminded of by any other way.
Azief then opens his eyes.
Now, at the end, he let it all go.
The memories and the life he experiences in this world…. he let it all go into the wind, leaving it in this world…but always engraved in his heart.
He would miss this world and its people.
He would miss the Three Devils, and he would remember the story of Lin Guifei, and if he saw a river he might be reminded of the beautiful Zhou River and his conversation with the Pia Wanderer.
When he saw a leave falls down from a tree he might be reminded of the steadfastness and the conviction of the Heaven Reaching Swordsman who would rather die than doing something against his conscience and each time he saw a butterfly he might be reminded of the Red Butterfly and the injustice she had received.
He would remember life and death, love and hatred and with a swish of his hand he would wave it away
And when he saw mist and foggy area he might be reminded of the Poison Valley and how it reminded him of young love
But most of all he thinks he would be reminded of his disciple.
‘Hah’ he sighed.
It was then that Xi Feng hand grips the handle of the wheelchair. Azief did not say anything because he knows why Xi Feng stopped the wheelchair.
Azief opens his eyes and Xi Feng who thought his teacher is still closing his eyes said
‘Master, open your eyes. We have arrived at the Thirteen Steps of Gods and Devils’ Azief smiles as he looks at the thirteen steps laid out in front of him. Then he laughs
‘It is the same. So eerily similar’ And his laugh reverberated around the entrance gate.
But Azief also notices that there is some statue of the steps that has disappeared.
The Thirteen Steps of Gods and Devils seems to have all the statue like the Supremacy Stairway of the Thirteen Steps.
Azief could even see some of the statue he couldn’t see when he is in the Supremacy Stairway because he couldn’t see when his eyes were gouged out from his eye socket.
But there is a difference between this Thirteen Steps of Gods and Devils in front of the Temple and the Thirteen Steps of the Supremacy Stairway
The difference is that some of its statue is missing
The ninth and the tenth statue seems to be taken away and it was then that he remembered Li Dan and his vague comments about his Cloud Abode had a beef with the Temple.
Could it be that Li Dan and the Cloud Abode stole the statue? From what he gathers the Seeking Path of Heaven creed of the Cloud Abode seems similar like Taoism.
And the one on the ninth and the tenth could be considered divine being related to that belief.
If Azief is not mistaken, the ninth statue seems to point towards the Three Pristine One. And the tenth statue is the Jade Emperor.
Azief sighed and thought to himself
‘Who would have thought it is like that? Li Dan must have experience how powerful the Temple really is and warn him because he was worried that he could not handle the Temple’
He chuckles a bit
Azief had heard many stories about the Temple and how it houses many grandmaster level combatants.
Most of these grandmaster is the previous Abbots or some stray Monk who finally found their way back to the Temple and as an act of atoning protect the Temple from invaders and people with bad intention
He then takes a deep breath inhaling and exhaling.
The wind is still blowing wildly as the Three Devils of Han did not understand what Azief means by saying it is the same.
Xi Feng on the other hand closes his eyes for a brief second, sorrow is apparent in his gaze.
His teacher is about to depart.
Before Azief could order his disciple to push the wheelchair forward, a sound of creaking could be heard.
Wind pulsates around the area
Slowly the large entrance gate of the temple of Xi opened ups lowly. As it opens the cold wind enters the Temple and as the snows surges in it blur the face of the person that opens the door.
As the wind grew calm, everyone could see a bald monk, wearing the monk robe and putting his hand together respectfully and bowed towards Azief.
‘Patron have finally arrived. This Penniless Monk have long been waiting’ The Monk said.
Azief then look at the monk, at the thirteen steps, at the entrance gate of the temple and once again he laughed freely
‘Is this destiny and fate?’ he asks to the heavens as the cold wind keep blowing, not giving him any answer.
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