Clara got up from her place on the ground. Then, moving quickly, without even a glance back, she headed for the door.
“Clara…?”
Clara froze but didn’t turn around.
“Just grabbing a drink, maybe a snack. I’ll bring you something if you want….”
“Oh…” Nessa said. “I’m ok, thanks.”
Clara nodded her head and then hurried out the door. She made it a whole five feet before she stopped and took short deep breaths trying to keep her emotions in check.
She thought about the way that Nessa had reacted to Clara’s hand almost touching her. She had practically recoiled.
“She hates me….” Clara whispered as tears gathered in her eyes. “My mate… hates me.”
She let them fall. It had only been three days since Nessa took the suppressants, but in those three days, they had barely talked, they hadn’t touched, and Clara was left feeling more alone than ever before.
“Clara?” a familiar voice called out.
Clara turned to see Galen approaching. His smile quickly turned to concern as he saw the devastated look on her face.
“What’s wrong? Are you ok?” Galen asked, hurrying to her side and placing his hand on her shoulder.
Clara sobbed. She didn’t care if it was inappropriate to lose control of her emotions in front of her Beta or if it just made him uncomfortable. She needed to let it out. She turned and threw herself into his arms. He was surprised, but he caught her and let her use his shoulder to cry.
“She hates me!” Clara cried out. “She thinks I’m disgusting or repulsive!”.
“What?” Galen asked, patting her back gently. “Who?”
“Nessa!”
“What? No, I saw you two just a week ago,” Galen laughed. “She definitely wasn’t disgusted by you.”
“That was before she took the suppressant,” Clara said softly as she pulled away from his arms. “Now, she’s different. She wants nothing to do with me.”
Clara sniffled and let out soft sobs.
Galen took a deep breath and rubbed her back gently.
“The bond is intense,” he began. “And for you two, it’s also brand new. Taking a suppressant so soon after experiencing it for the first time, it’s gotta be jarring. She probably just feels confused by the dramatic shift in her mindset.”
“Yea… because she hates me!” Clara replied with renewed tears.
“Clara, have you tried talking to her?” Galen asked.
“She doesn’t want to talk to me.”
“Have you tried? Really tried?” Galen asked again.
Clara looked up at him and then turned away.
“Maybe not as hard as I could have.”
“Every relationship needs communication, bond or no bond,” he smiled. “Without it, you have nothing. So talk to her, tell her what’s on your mind, and ask her how she feels, don’t just assume you know.”
Clara sniffled and looked up at him sadly.
“What if what she feels… really is what I think it is?” she asked. “What if she does hate me?”
Galen let out a soft chuckle and pulled her into another hug. He rubbed her back gently as he spoke.
“It’s impossible to hate you, Clara. You’re too adorable.”
“Clara?”
Galen and Clara both turned to see Nessa standing just outside the door to Cain’s lab. She stared at the way they held each other and then raised a brow and clenched her jaw. Finally, she straightened her back and opened the door.
“Don’t let me interrupt,” she said as she went back inside.
“Now would be a perfect time for that conversation,” Galen said, letting go of Clara.
Clara swallowed and nodded.
Galen gave her a thumbs-up as she glanced back over her shoulder. She took a deep breath and unlocked the door.
Nessa was already back at her computer, typing away. Her eyes glanced up at Clara for just a moment. A flash of her dark hazel. Like a dense forest penetrated by the rays of a setting sun.
Clara licked her lips and walked further into the room until she was standing about a foot away from Nessa.
“I thought you were getting a drink,” Nessa said without looking up.
“Huh?” Clara replied, surprised that Nessa had spoken first.
“You said you were going to go get a drink or snack. That’s why you left.”
“Oh… yea… I got distracted,” Clara said.
“I noticed,” Nessa replied curtly.
Clara furrowed her brows and looked carefully at Nessa. Her lips were pursed, and she huffed after she spoke. Her typing was louder, more aggressive than it had been previously. She was acting strange.
“Wait…” Clara began as realization hit her. “Are you jealous? Of Galen?”
Nessa took a slow breath through her nose and swallowed but didn’t say anything. She just continued typing.
“Nessa,” Clara called to her, gathering her courage. “I think we need to talk.”
Nessa stopped typing and licked her lips.
“Should I be jealous?” Nessa asked, still not looking up at Clara.
“Are you?”
“Should I be?” Nessa asked again, this time looking up at Clara. There was a hint of fear in her eyes. But mainly a genuine concern.
“No,” Clara said. “Not at all.”
There was relief in her expression, just enough to chase away the fear.
“Ok.” Nessa nodded and returned to typing.
Clara chewed her lip. Knowing that Nessa was jealous proved she didn’t hate her, didn’t it? But it wasn’t enough of an answer.
“Not ok,” Clara said.
Nessa looked up at her.
“I’m not ok,” Clara smiled sadly. Tears pooled in her eyes once again. “Do you… even like me?”
Nessa stopped typing. She stood up slowly.
“What?” she asked.
Clara sniffled and wiped her eyes. Then, trying to keep herself together, she babbled.
“Look, I understand that the bond was sudden and intense, and maybe it wasn’t what you wanted. I heard that happens sometimes. People don’t want the person they end with. Maybe you don’t even like girls, maybe this thing just forced me on you, and you’re disgusted and scared, and you don’t know how to get away from me and–”
“I like girls!” Nessa said quickly.
Clara nodded awkwardly.
“Ok, well… that’s good.”
“I like you, Clara,” Nessa added.
Clara looked up with a combined hope and fear.
“I do,” Nessa smiled.
Clara smiled and bit her lower lip. She took a step forward, and Nessa took a step back. Clara saw that same look in her eyes. The panic at proximity. She stopped and took a deep breath.
“Is there like a Broken Crag custom that I don’t know of, where you run from your mate or something? Because I don’t get it….”
Nessa sighed and looked to the ground.
“No,” she said softly.
“Ok… then I really don’t understand, Nessa,” Clara sighed in frustration. “You say you like me, but then you seem disgusted by me.”
“It’s not that,” Nessa replied, hugging her arm anxiously.
“Then what is it?” Clara asked. “Because I thought we felt the same way. When we met, and over the almost three weeks we’ve known each other. But, for the past three days, all I have felt is alone.”
Nessa looked up at Clara, noticing there were tears in her eyes. She licked her lips nervously.
“Clara, I’m…” she paused, taking a slow breath. “I like you. You’re cute, you’re smart, you smell good, and you say whatever is on your mind. Sometimes it comes out in this spew of random and crazy, and it’s just so freaking adorable.”
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