Chapter 54: What is Madness?
Crazy.
This is my honest opinion.
When we first were united, I touched that “Abyss” just a little.
What the heck was that? It seems my Second still isn’t aware of it, but as a matter of fact, evoking each other’s memories is a simple task.
However, I couldn’t comprehend those memories I called forth.
A deep, dark heart. One that was beyond comprehension was driving my Second’s body.
No, maybe should I call that my Seven?
My Second has lived a different life previously―― I’ve reigned as the Great Spirit King for so long that I can’t even remember, and in that time, I’ve caught glimpses of life on a few different planets. However, I’ve never seen or heard anything like that of his previous life. The honorable Second, he who was the first human I served under, was a very special existence. He stood atop a world that was similar yet different to this one. That’s what I don’t understand. I can’t understand. I can’t understand the darkness that resides in that heart.
……However, only this I understand. Only this thing is clear.
My Second is crazy. The way his mind works is exquisitely deviated.
It’s somehow weird that he has memories which exceeds the scope of my understanding.
And so, my Second happily went ahead. To fight against an opponent whom in my eyes, the eyes of the Great Spirit King, was judged to be way over his league.
And currently, he was completely overwhelming that Darkness Wolf.
He has yet to receive a single attack from the other party, and has continuously connected his attacks at every opportunity given, almost as if he could see the future. A technique stepping on the divine was repeated over and over again, like threading a hair through a needle’s hole from a few meters away.
Impossible. I wonder what is going through his mind right now? As I was concerned about these events, I took a peek inside his mind.
……And I regretted it. Rather than comprehending it more, I was further away from that understanding.
My Second wasn’t thinking about anything.
Not quite so, on the surface he was thinking about the best response to the different patterns of the Darkness Wolf.
But deep down…… there was a strong, crazy “pleasure”.
My Second was pleased to be able to be alive right now. It was not a shallow thought either, but an uncontrollable emotion that gushed out precisely because he was alive.
Why?
I thought he was enjoying the thrill of the fight, but it was something different.
For my Second, the meaning of being alive was in the fight against the Darkness Wolf.It was even the very meaning of his existence. And at the same time, this deadly fight, he saw it as nothing but a “game”. No, this wasn’t only a simple thought. He had carved in his self the fact that he could no longer turn back, inscribed it so deeply in his mind and body that it could no longer be erased. That was the reason why he “only thought of this as a game”. And that’s why his mind and body one-sidedly felt pleased.
――『The top in the world』――I suddenly remembered. This was my Second’s wish. However, I knew he wasn’t just aiming at it. He wanted to someday “Get it back”. That spot. That resolution was genuine and my Second was truly risking his life, steeling himself in order to return to being the top in the world without fail.
…………I was taken aback.
Maybe my Second really was “betting his life for the game”……?
To play in order to live, the meaning of his existence was to continue reigning as the top in the world, and…… right now, he wasn’t the top in the world.
In order to regain “his own existence”, that’s the reason my Second was standing here right now.
Even if it was so helplessly crazy.
Even if it was a fight nobody could win.
He was fighting all alone, making full use of those weird and strange strategies that even me, the Great Spirit King, couldn’t imagine or even completely understand.
“（My Second……!）“
I felt something burning deep inside me.
What an obsession! How tenacious! What a solitude……!
I was deeply impressed by this lonely and sublimely crazy man, wishing to be stronger than anyone else, doing everything in his power to make that wish come true no matter the cost……!
“（My Second! !）“
“Just shut up and keep quietly possessing me! “
Okay. I’ll gladly keep it up!
But my Second, you should know this for sure. You’re not alone anymore. This Angolmois is with you, and I’ll walk along your path as you risk your life!
“（Ahahahahahahaha）“
“Shut up! ! “
＊ ＊ ＊
I wonder if it’s been an hour already? Anko’s HP finally went down to below two tenths.
This was something easy to tell. When the Darkness Wolf’s HP falls below 25%, the whole body is engulfed by dark flames, signaling the change to “Berserk Mode”. And by calculating the number of attacks it took up until the moment she entered berserk mode, you can approximate the number of attacks needed to drop her to 20%.
And. Now, for the way to tame. The best moment to use 《Tame》 is when she uses Rush. It was with this timing that I was able to tame her in my previous life.
“……And, it failed.”
Well, I expected that.
Letting out a sigh, I took out six high-grade potions from my inventory and threw them at the biting Anko.
The potions’ bottles cracked when they touched the dark flame of the Berserk Mode, and the liquid splashed all over her body. And so, in the blink of an eye, Anko’s HP was completely recovered.
“（Was that okay! ?）“
“Like I said. It’s more efficient this way.”
“（So that’s how it is……）“
Like a flame extinguished by dousing it with water, the dark flames covering Anko’s whole body went out with a similar sound, abruptly ending the Berserk Mode. Anko was also making an expression as if saying “Ehh? Huh? Why? ” or at least that’s how it looked to me―― she’s a monster after all. That’s why she can’t break out the predetermined pattern, following bite comes a Darkness Howl.
“Alright, let’s start over again.”
I have to shave off eight tenths of her health again.
About one hour…… It took over twice as long as back then.
Well, can’t do anything but be patient.
Slapping my cheeks to pump myself up, I went at Anko again.
“Uff, so tired……”
After that, I fought with her and failed to Tame her nine more times, then I went back to the tent, exhausted. There’re no worries about being chased, since the Darkness Wolf can’t leave the Underground Grand Library in Isoreus after all.
“You kept overpowering that creature for ten hours. It’s no wonder you’re tired.”
After a long time, Angolmois finally materialized. He then proceeded to pour some alcohol into a cup for me, as if telling me that I’ve worked hard. I wonder if I’m the first human in the world to ever receive this treatment from the very own Great Spirit King. I felt really good with myself after thinking that.
“I’ll keep doing this every day though.”
“……I see. Well, if the fights continue just like today, I think there won’t be a problem doing this daily.”
“No, I was just lucky today. She never used False Shadow at the time of Darkness Summon.”
“Ohh? “
“After Darkness Shift into human form, it’s either Darkness Summon or Darkness Magic. During the transformation, you just need to prepare Dragon King Swordsmanship to stun her, then bring her down with two critical shots of Rook at her feet. That way you can fight safely without having to worry about Darkness Summon or Darkness Magic.”
“I see. So, the risk of the Darkness Wolf using Darkness Summon or Darkness Magic increases if you aren’t able to stun her due to her using False Shadow after you unleash Dragon King Swordsmanship.”
“Yeah. Darkness Magic poses almost no problem. As for Darkness Summon, if it summons a shadow cane and switches to Jojutsu Mode, it’s fine. But if it switched to the Dark Flame Spear, the strongest mode……”
“……What happens then? “
“I might have to use that…… my hidden card.”
It was boring here.
Why am I trapped in this place?
I even read all the books that were in here, but I still didn’t know why.
Just how many hundreds of years have passed since I got my own ego?
Let’s try asking when a human visits this place. Or so I thought, but even then, this body of mine won’t listen to me.
From the deepest parts of my heart, a strong murderous desire overflowed, immediately moving my body into action.
Ahh, I’ve killed again.
What a fragile existence.
I can’t find someone who can fill my heart.
Next time for sure. Next time for sure.
However, I always killed them.
There’s nothing I can do about it.
……And gradually. I started to have fun killing them.
These humans, they were all weak. Their very important, lovely and more-precious-than-anything flames of life were extinguished as easily as if gently blowing on them. That’s why, I really want to rob them of that. I can’t hold back the urge to break them. Yeah, with these very hands.
Come on, be more tenacious. Live strong, be wiser. Be proud of your own life force. I’ll give your body the chance to show me a lively figure.
Alright, that’s enough! ……What a trifling thing.
Who will come here next? What kind of life will come? How will they die before me? I can’t wait, I can’t wait……
For my playthings. For my everything. For the only moment where I can feel myself be alive.
———
Then.
――He came. Finally. He’s here. My destined person.
I felt a strong bond, as if he had cherished me, loved me, in a previous life.
However, my body began to move by itself. Similar to receiving an order to kill. An order given by God, whom I can’t defy.
Ahh, Ahhhh, AAHHHH! I will kill this personage too! What a…… What a wonderful feeling! There has never been a pleasure like this――!
———
…………! ?
Suddenly, a sweet tingling pierced my body.
This was the first time I’ve felt something, the first stimulus I’ve had in hundreds of years. Why? How? I’m feeling danger for my life! This great me!
Damn……!
Both my hands and feet, they can’t move! For this me! For this great me! How is that possible! ? NO! That’s impossible! However, it’s happening!
Fuu……! The pain has continued to accumulate! Such a, such a thing…… This is the first time too……!
Ah……Ha……!
———
……Ah……Ahah, AhahaHAHAHAHA!
Alive! I felt so alive! !
I see! I spent those hundreds of years in darkness in order for this meeting to happen, and I was born out of darkness in order to meet this person!
Ouch! It hurts! But it also feels good! !
More! Hurt me more! More suffering! Give me more pleasure! Ahh, this is amazing!
No, I’ll die at this rate……! It’s over now, isn’t it? ……It was a really good time. I want to reach climax by your hands at the end. To be embraced, this dream that I’ve had for the last several hundreds of years I’ve been alive, it seems like it’ll be fulfilled in less than an hour. Ahh, this is bliss……
———
………………Ehh?
What……! ? Why, why are you…… healing me……! ?
But this indeed was happening! Is this some sort of dream coming true! ?
You really are the one who embodies my ideals! Your splendor is hard to describe with words! My destined person! My Lord……!
Ahhh, AAAAHHHHHHHH!
THIS IS THE BEST! I’M ALREADY FLYING……!
…………
……Hehehe, hehehehehe.
Since then, I became absorbed and lost myself in this. I was reminiscent of a long-forgotten pleasure, this provoking body firmly remembered it.
And I finally met him. My Lord.
Time and time again, he tossed me around. With each passing moment, he disciplined this fleeting and ephemeral me. He gave me pain, suffering, the feeling of being alive.
Eventually, my Lord went back. However, I understood. Those clear eyes unmistakably said “I won’t let you escape”, as he was leaving. My Lord will surely come again. And at that moment, he will take care of me once again.
Ahhh, what a wonderful feeling. I wish and pray for me to live together with my Lord. And I want him to hold my neck high in his precious and beautiful hands. Oh God, please grant me these two conflicting wishes.
And like a girl who felt love for the very first time, my delusions overflowed, unstoppable. Lord, Lord, my Lord……someday, please let me hear your name. And if possible, please give me a name too. And then, with those hands on this neck……
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