The fact that Ian couldn't control his fire element and now the fact that he could only craft Teleportation Talisman papers for small distances … If it wasn't a psychological blockage then it was … Kevin really hadn't a clue ... He was too new to this world to be able to make assumptions.
Kevin thought for a while then he said to Ian : "Everything you have told me is pretty positive, you are not afraid of fire, it's just that you can't control your element, and therefore you are afraid of hurting innocent people.
And I don't need to look at your Stats to be sure that you are a very powerful mage ... From my deductions, from what I have understood about your world, there must be something that prevents you from using your elements correctly."
Ian looked at him startled and repeated with a frown : "Something that would prevent me from using my elements properly… What are you thinking of ?"
Kevin sighed helplessly and said to him : "Liam thinks it's a psychological blockage but not me… You wouldn't have tried again to use your fire element if you were afraid of fire, something else must be hindering you and preventing you to control the particles in the spiritual energy but I don't know what though."
Ian had never thought at this possibility, somehow he felt relieved by Kevin analysis, and then he asked him : "So, what do we do ?"
Kevin smirked and said : "Right now, there is nothing we can do about it, only time will help us to understand what may be interfering between you and your elements.
So it's time for us to practice … Show me what Liam taught you, so I can see what your fighting skills are and then I will help you the best I can to improve."
Ian just nodded, he felt better now that he had confessed all this to someone, it wasn't that he didn't want to talk about it with Liam, it was just that Liam had never asked the right questions like Kevin had just done.
Liam probably didn't want to rush him, but his sense of inferiority and insecurity had grown gradually with all their misunderstandings.
Liam thought he was the only one who had had feelings all this time but Ian had been in love with him for a long time as well.
Liam hadn't only saved him that night, he had given him a place he felt safe, and they had lived together in his apartment until he was old enough to begin his apprenticeship as a mage.
He had resented him when he had told him that it would be better if he had his own room now that he was about to start his classes, and that he needed to make new friends.
He had said that, this way, he woudn't feel lonely anymore when he had to leave for a mission.
He had thought that Liam only wanted to get rid of him, and that maybe he had someone else he wanted to live with.
Only, when he had found himself alone in this room, his nightmares which during the time he had lived with Liam had gone, returned, more vivid than ever.
Kevin had understood immediately that it was not the fact of having killed this man that had traumatized him, it was the fact that he had not been able to control anything when he wanted to stop it, the power that had taken possession of his body frightened him greatly.
And so, after only 3 nights, Liam had come to pick him up again, he had told him that he had tried to restrain himself, and that with more time his nightmares would surely have passed by themselves, but he couldn't bear to seeing him in pain so he had taken him back to his appartment and they continued to sleep together for another 3 years.
Even though they slept together they had always had a platonic relationship, Ian thought that Liam felt responsible for him and saw him as a little brother and Liam must have believed that he only saw him as his savior or a big brother but not as a potential lover.
He had ended up taking a pavilion for himself when Liam was gone on a long mission.
He thought that Liam would never share his feelings so it was better to put some distance between them, so that the two of them could regain some freedom, he had thought that maybe he was preventing Liam from sharing life with the person he loved.
After that, Liam had been more distant but they had always kept a good relationship and then everything turned upside down when they had shared the same room last year during the annual capital's tournament.
After Axel and Alan's victory they had all drunk a little too much and when Liam had carried him to their room, probably because of the alcohol, he had decided to cross the line and try his luck.
He had kissed him passionately as he had always dreamed of and as in his dream, Liam had responded to his kiss with an urgency that had surprised him at first but only increased his desire for him.
That night they had made love for the first time and when they had woken up the next morning, Liam hadn't given him time to regret what they had done and he had made love to him again.
The pretext of alcohol being no longer valid, Liam had confessed the feelings he had for him and he had told him what he meant to him.
He had told him that he had already drunk his blood the first time they had made love and that he was going to have to make a choice whether he wanted to stay the rest of his life with him or not.
Liam had told him to take his time because there would be no turning back if he chose to drink his blood too.
So before to make this decision, he wanted them to talk to each other like they had done a few days earlier, but while they were coming back to the Sun Sect, Liam had to go on a mission and he hadn't heard from him for almost 8 months.
When Liam had finally came back, his feelings were too confused, in 8 months he had had time to ask himself too many questions ... What if Liam had told him that only because he had drunk his blood and therefore couldn't be with someone else anymore ?.... Maybe he didn't really like him after all.
So, too scared to confront him he had been hidding from him.
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