Chapter 217 MOBA, mo booty
At the edge of the nightclub, the four PUAs finalized their group pick up strategy, and soon, in the style of a celebrity marriage, they split up!
Each went off to perform their respective role!
The first one out was Antonio. As the scout and jungler, his job was to select the targets. Knowing it would be bad if his mission leaked out, he narrowed his eyes, entering stealth as he sneaked around the club to find the ideal p*ssy pathways.
...
Hiding behind corners, peeking his head over the bar, and shadowing behind fatties...
These were the tactics he adopted, and he was too suitable for this role! With his narrow frame and buzz cut, there was only one word to describe him—aerodynamic...
A short while later, he smiled, because he’d found the first target! The first step of the plan was complete! Having chosen a group of four girls at the bar, Antonio glanced back and sent a hand signal to the next key member of the chain--the man far behind him, who was releasing the support aura--the heavy artillery and tank—Beluga!
He’d been leaning back against the bar, securing their home base and flag-point as he waited for Antonio’s signal. Now, it was finally his time to strike!
Like a human bowling ball...he used his massive size to power through the crowd, marching towards Antonio who’d taken partial cover behind a tree--a lanky drunk man in green...
Passing Antonio, Beluga soon reached the target, and fired his heavy ordinance! The opening line!
This was his role! As the most experienced of the group, his openers were deadly and came with an AOE effect! Upon delivering his line with his imposing frame, he captured the aggro of all the girls!
They tried to fire back shit tests, but there was almost no effect! The attacks were absorbed by Beluga’s confidence shield and massive health bar--aka infinite delusion and shamelessness.
...
As a high level tank, Beluga didn’t even need to launch attacks back. With his experience and developed skill tree, he’d already developed a thorn aura! Bouncing back the sh*t tests from the women as his own negs!
The girls realized their attacks were useless on him and they were even taking some damage themselves, but there was nothing they could do about it! His words enraptured them! They were under the tank’s control!
With slow and charm auras cast on all of them, they were stuck in the set! The second step of the group attack plan was complete!
Next up, it was the moment for the official start of the group battle!
With an assured smirk, Beluga gazed at the girls. "You have to meet my friend. He’s the coolest guy in here. You’re going to love him!" With the setup complete, he turned around and waved, indicating for his teammate to engage—the third wheel of veal...
It was the bomb disposal expert and utility player, Chuck!
Receiving the signal, he walked over with a smile. "What’s up, ladies?"
Right away, the eyes of all the women lit up!
"Toooo cute!"
"Oh my God, he’s adorable!"
"What’s your name? Come to momma!"
He defused all the obstacles! Their traps became useless scrap under his eyes! Chuck was nigh unstoppable, for one simple reason—the shota effect!
His appearance was too damn lovable! With his small size and big cute eyes, he lulled them into a helpless state! This was his hypnotic ability! He was a shota-conman!
Deadly, but the women sensed zero threat! Like a killer rabbit in a monster’s cave!
Like a tub of popcorn with a hole at the bottom!
As Chuck entered the set and started conversing, the girls all fawned over him, falling further under the team’s double layer of control. For some reason, they felt he was naturally trustworthy, and thus, stage 3 of the plan...was complete!
The women were lined up and ready to be taken down! Now, there was only one step remaining! To finish these targets off!
For this role, who else could it be, but the man himself, the famous finisher of women, chosen for this because he was number one...chronologically to volunteer!
...
Of course, it was none other, than Ben! As he saw Beluga’s signal to come over, he smirked. ’Let’s slay these whorelocks!’
...
His role was a crucial one--the sniper, the ADC, the damage dealer! Once the set was under control, he’d come in and take one down with his charm! Solving one of their troublesome members! Gaining advantage in the group battle!
Soon, Ben entered the set, greeting the group and positioning himself near the girl Beluga pointed out as his target. First, he checked her status.
[Target’s current attraction level: disinclined]
’It’s lower because she’s so hot, which also means I probably wouldn’t pass the value judgment now. So it’s good Beluga used an indirect opener, and as per the plan, he and Chuck haven’t initiated a value test yet by going direct.’ Ben remembered what they discussed: Stay indifferent until they all raised attraction high enough, at which point one of them would activate the value test.
It was key that person passed. Otherwise, it would burn the entire group, and the one slotted for that role--was Ben!
As he reviewed the details, Beluga was giving the women an introduction to him like the one for Chuck earlier. "My buddy Ben is the man. Top student at NYU. Just got a big promotion at Hearth, the massive media company. He’s super fun! You’re going to love him!"
When it ended, Ben noticed a difference with his target.
[Target’s current attraction level: indifferent(+1)]
He couldn’t help reveal a small smile at this buff from the tank. In essence, Beluga was bragging for Ben, but it worked because Ben wasn’t the one doing it. If he bragged himself like that, he’d come off as being full of himself or bullsh*tting.
However, coming out of someone else’s mouth, it was believable! The reason was people tended to be jealous, so rarely bragged about others! Beluga used this knowledge to create this introductory technique, which raised the attraction level for each teammate in a safe and fast way!
As they continued conversing for a while, Antonio also joined and it became 4v4. Sensing the moment approaching, Ben glanced at his target’s status.
[Target’s current attraction level: attracted(+4)]
So far, he’d been successful in building up her attraction. Now, it was time for him to fill his role as the damage dealer!
He winked at Beluga, as Chuck and Antonio also received signals—that it was now! The moment arrived! Ben’s turn to shine!
His job now was simple, to engage the value test by going direct, thus communicating his romantic intentions. Then, he’d extract that girl to another part of the club so he could work comfort on her alone. Once her friends saw that and realized this 4v4 became romantic, the other girls would also open up to their own partners. This was a group AOE attack! One that reduced their defenses!
Beluga also trusted Ben could fulfill this role. After all, he’d been sleeping with many beautiful women at NYU, so Beluga believed there was no way he didn’t know how to escalate.
Hence, the moment arrived.
With the stage set, Ben approached the target who was giggling at his jokes with a cute smile, and recalled the plan. ’I’ll do it as we discussed. Beluga said I need to isolate her somewhere alone.’
Ben leaned into her ear, and when she didn’t move back, showing she’d already taken a liking to him, he felt even more assured. Even more important though--he had faith in himself and his crew. They’d done so much setup, and the conditions were flawless. The target was ready. His confidence was sky-high. It was all for this moment. He couldn’t fail. "Can I come home with you? It won’t take long."
...
A minute later, as Ben’s target pulled away the other girls with a face of disgust, he yelled at her in disbelief. "Are you not gonna let me ult?!?"
———
*Author’s note: Please don’t comment complaining about Ben’s stupidity. Yes, his common sense is lacking as I’ve mentioned in previous notes and comments, but there’s a good reason why he failed, beyond it being funny. I’ll explain everything in the next chapter, so have a laugh and relax.
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