Chapter 188 - My Calm
"Happy thoughts!" I huffed, blowing air to the few strands of hair falling on my face while I sat upright. Sam set his dilated eyes to me. If his eyes could speak, it'd be saying, 'how dare you, a peasant, lay your dirty hands on me?!'.
Good thing I could just feign ignorant about it and move on. That's the plan.
"Wife, you've been growing violent the longer you stay here." Sam clicked his tongue and shook his head in disbelief.
Did he mean the longer I stay with him? Not that it was a bad thing, but well, it was because I sometimes felt like becoming a villainess. His influence was no joke.
"Stop saying such ominous things!" I frowned, raising my hand, only to stop in the air after seeing him raise his arm to block it. "Husband, are you afraid of being hit?"
I'm certain I didn't use too much force while slapping his shoulder. He wouldn't get hurt, but I would, that's why. I blinked my eyes as he awkwardly put his arms down, surprised at his own action.
"Why would I get scared of being hit?" He intoned, sporting his usual indifferent expression.
Really? Was it just my imagination? I tilted my head and bit my lip before slamming my hand down.
"Ah!" Sam shrieked as he rolled on his tummy, making me panic as my palm landed on his back. Why would he roll the second I decided to test him?
Fingers trembling, I asked him. "Are you alright, husband?" He was just exaggerating, right? There was no way Sam would be in pain after being hit by me, but he's not someone who would fake something like this, either.
"Husband?" I called worriedly and rubbed his back. "Are you alright? I didn't mean it. I'm sorry…"
I trailed off as he suddenly pulled my wrist before I knew it; I'm locked in his embrace. His grip tightened as he pulled me closer, closing his eyes.
"Sam?" I looked up, but he kept his eyes shut. Now that he's like this, there's definitely a problem.
"I'm tired, let me rest first."
"Did you not sleep last night?" I frowned and sighed.
Sam let out a low hum. "My wife, are you forgetting I'm nocturnal?"
"Oh…" I forgot about that as everyone in the ducal residence adjusted to meet my schedule. In here, the palace was much livelier (if that was even the right word), during nighttime.
Those who directly served under me were the only ones who adjusted their schedules to meet mine. But I wouldn't mind being alone, honestly.
"I will rest a little." His voice really sounded exhausted. I never heard him sigh this much or even pant. That's why I stayed still and monitored his breathing.
My eyes softened, as I could even feel his fatigue. "Did you have a lot to think about last night?" I blurted out and felt relieved when it didn't seem he'd wake up.
"What should I do?" I murmured under my breath as I stared at his sleeping face. "To lessen your burden? You should have more happy thoughts, husband. This place is depressing enough."
Another helpless sigh slipped past my lips as I could not help but feel down about this. I wanted to help him a little, because Sam was already struggling enough to keep his wild thoughts under control. On top of the current state of affairs.
I jolted when Sam suddenly requested, "Keep talking. It calms me."
"Huh?"
"Your voice, it calms me. So keep talking." He said, embracing me tighter, as if he was afraid I'd just disappear if he didn't hold me properly.
My heart warmed up as I smacked my lips, thinking of what to say until I was reminded of my happy thoughts last night.
"Sam, do you remember? Back in Grimsbanne…" and I talked nonstop, just remembering our time together in Grimsbanne and how peaceful it was. Sam didn't respond or answer, but the thought that he'd at least have some peace was good enough for me.
*****
After an hour of nonstop talking, the maids came in and helped us do our morning routine. As usual, Sam just watched us on the divan before we headed to the dining hall. To my surprised, the normal and decent meal I considered in this place seemed to have been taken away from me as well.
My heart sank as I gaze at the people around the long dining table. It's just breakfast, so why were everyone present?
'You should've stuffed yourself more last night!' My subconscious mind foreshadowed.
I should've. Breakfast was the only time I enjoyed food, but that seemed impossible now. How are they all awake? Not to mention, what's with the intense death stare?
My eyes shifted at Sam, who was also unusually quiet, but he still faced me squarely when he noticed my stare. His eyes bore complete puzzlement, asking me what did I want.
"Don't mind us, Lilou. We're following our family tradition since you're now a part of our family." I flinched and instinctively moved my eyes towards Stefan, who immediately caught my gaze.
'Does that mean you'll only join me now?' I wondered as my eyes sparkled with hope. Please spare me one peaceful meal without being tortured by your auras!
*PANG!*
I jumped as a sudden loud noise startled me back to my senses. My eyes fell on the knife Sam suddenly stabbed on the surface of the table, causing the plates on the table to bounce.
"Oh, sorry," Sam apologized half-heartedly as he pulled out the knife and gazed at Hanz across from him.
Panic crawled up to my heart as I felt anxious the second Sam and Hanz eyes met, making me reached for his hand, squeezing it. "Husband," I said and Sam looked back at me.
"Yes, wife?"
"Let's eat?" I chuckled awkwardly as I forced a smile onto my face. Sam batted his eyes lazily, nodding as he picked up a roll and put butter on it.
"Here," He said, warming up my heart.
"Thank you," I smiled as I am melting whenever my husband acts especially kind to me. However… I couldn't enjoy that feeling for too long, as everyone's eyes never left me.
'What is wrong with them?!' I wept internally while keeping my exterior unfazed.
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