Chapter 856: Never be a mistake but a blessing

“You have to push.” A voice penetrated her chaotic brain, feeling her body was about to burst with its already frayed nerves. “Push harder.”

Finally, after nine months of waiting, her child is coming. She could not wait to see her baby as her tears dropped in her eyes like a waterfall, blurring her sight.

She could barely see the white walls around her, the machine that littered the floor, or the people trying to help her. All she could sense was excitement that soon she would become a mother.

But then again, she would be reminded of the pain of giving birth as her doctor shouted at her. “Come on, Sarah. You have to do better than that.” The doctor called her attention, bringing her back to the present.

It was easy and pleasurable to create this child, but bringing her baby to the world was a different story as pain shot up in her body, coming from all directions.

She was happy that finally, her daughter was coming into the world. She looked forward to holding her in her arms soon. But she also felt terrible because she could not share this moment with the man she loved.

“I am trying.” She hissed in between her breaths as she attempted to push and expel air out of her body.

.....

It was easier to run several miles when she was trying to catch a story than to lie on this bed and push her baby out of her body. It felt like she had run several marathons. Yet, she was not halfway down as tears and sweat covered her body.

“Try harder, Sarah,” Amelia whispered in her ears as she tried to help and guide her through this ordeal, holding her hands, giving her strength.

However, as much as she appreciated what her friend was doing. At that moment, she only wanted one person to hold her hand and to share this momentous event in their life.

But that would never happen because she had destroyed every hope that she and Lance would end up together ever again. She was a fool to believe she was ready for a life without him.

She had allowed the Count to bully her into agreeing to his wishes, not considering what Lance would feel. Now, she had lost her chance for a life with the man she loved.

“Aaaggghhh!” She shouted at the top of her lungs, enduring the pain that crippled her body into a heaping mess. But this was nothing compared to the pain of knowing she had lost her chance for a future with a great husband.

But more than that, she had robbed her child of a chance to meet her father. She destroyed her future because she was weak and insecure about herself, and she did not trust love to pull them through in this situation.

Now, her child would grow up with only her at her side. Still, she would do anything for her baby. But what she could not give her was a father who would have loved her with all his heart.

“I am the most stupid person in the entire world.” She mumbled as tears continued to fall in her eyes. She had no idea if anyone could have understood her words since she had said them together with her sobs.

But the pity in her friend’s eyes told her that Amelia felt sorry for her. “Sarah, stop being hard on yourself.” Amelia held her hands tighter as if assuring her that she was still there for her.

She wished her friends were enough, but how could they replace Lance in her life, or more importantly, in her child’s life? She needed Lance as much as her child needed a father.

But she blew it. She ruined her chance to get back with him and be a family. Last night, he announced that he was getting married. Soon, he would become King.

She did not care about the Kingdom. She only wanted him, but that opportunity had sailed. She had no choice but to face a future without him and a child without a father.

“Sarah, I need you to focus on your child. She needs you right now.” The doctor snapped her from her reverie. “Come on, push for me.”

The doctor was right. She could not turn back time. She could not keep regretting the past and blaming herself for her mistakes. She had to move forward. For her child, she had to be stronger.

From this point forward, she had to think about her child and nothing else. What would be best for her under her current situation? And what she needed for a better future.

“Sarah, you can do this.” Amelia kept repeating a name she thought she would never get used to hearing. But it was her name now.

She had to lock Eida and Lance and all their memories inside a chest and throw away the key. Then bury it somewhere where no one could find it. The last thing she needed was someone unearthing a past that had no place in the future.

“Now, Sarah, concentrate.” The doctor looked at her again. “You have been in labor for a long time. We don’t want to cut you now. So, please, give it all you got.”

The doctor would like to avoid a caesarian section. She wanted to deliver her child naturally. First, it would be better for her faster recovery. Then, it would be safer for her child due to fewer complications.

She could hear the concern in her voice as she felt her body weaken. She had no idea how long she could keep doing this as her energy dwindled. But her child seemed to be fighting against her, not wanting to move out of her body.

Was that a sign that her baby girl got her temperament and her father’s stubbornness, a frightful combination of traits for a single mother like her? How could she raise this child alone and discipline her to become a better person?

“Sarah, are you even listening? Focus and breathe for me. Then, push.” The doctor instructed as she kept zoning out due to exhaustion and the feelings consuming her.

But she had to focus. She had to put all her remaining energy into pushing this child safely out into this world. Then with regards to the rest of her worries. She would have to deal with that as she cradled her child in her arms.

“Aaaaahhhhh!” She cried, shouted, and hissed, pushing and pushing until the doctor announced that the head was crowning, whatever that meant.

“Come on, Sarah. I can see her now. I need a few more big pushes, and it would be all over.” The doctor told her as she encouraged her to give her all.

“You heard that, Sarah. Our little angel is coming. Come on, help her.” Amelia pushed the hair that clung to her sweat-stained forehead, giving her a better view of what was happening.

She felt weak. Still, she knew she had to do this for her child. She gathered all the remaining strength left in her body and pushed with all her might. The pain and the exhaustion strained her body, but she had to continue as all her fights showed on her facial expression.

She had already let her daughter down. She could not disappoint her again by being weak. Not ever again. She would fight with every ounce of her body and soul to give her life and a future. Not just today but for all the rest of her days.

Yes, she was giving birth to a daughter. Not an heir to the throne. But she would be the princess in her life. She might not get a Kingdom or all the money and luxury of this world, but she would have a mother who would love her all her life.

“Aaaggghhh!” She shouted one last time until finally, she had nothing more to give as her body slumped on the bed, wasted.

“Good job, Sarah!” She heard the doctor say, but she was too tired to ask what it meant.

Was it over? But she still had not heard her child cry. “What is wrong? Where is my baby?”

“Don’t worry.” The doctor attempted to calm her down. “They are just making sure that she is ok. She is a beautiful baby girl.” She continued, not wanting her to get stressed out over nothing.

She felt a pride she had never felt before upon hearing those words. She was now a mother. She could sense her heart beating wildly inside her chest at the thought that soon, she would be holding her child in her arms.

“Yes, she is beautiful.” Amelia acknowledged as she smiled, reassuring her that nothing was wrong with the baby. “Wait till you see her.” She wiped her face dry, removing the sweat and tears that covered her face.

She would take her friend’s word for it. Even if she had not seen her baby yet, she believed her daughter would be the most beautiful child to set foot on this earth.

She could not wait to see her child, conceived out of love. She might not have known she was in love with him at the time, but she knew their attraction had not been mere lust. Their relationship had always been something more meaningful, driven by forces stronger than just physical attraction.

“Here she is.” The doctor excitedly announced as she carried a child and placed it in her arms, letting her rest on her chest. “Do you have a name for her?”

She thought she had already cried enough, but new tears formed in her eyes, seeing the sweet and adorable bundle of joy in her arms. Then, the doctor’s question reminded her that she still had not decided what to call her.

But something suddenly clicked in her mind as she looked into her cute, lovely face. “Luisa.” She said aloud, whispering it to her delicate ears. Suddenly, she believed her baby smiled.

“Her name is Luisa.” She confirmed as she landed a gentle kiss on her soft, cuddly cheeks.

No matter what happened to her past, her daughter would never be a mistake but a blessing in her life.

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