Have you ever felt your body imploding? Your body curls into itself to fill the voids. As you swim inside your head and try to embrace the darkness, you feel that small barrier—the one that divides your conscience from comfort. The hardest thing you have to do is let go and embrace it.
I tried.
I fought hard to recover from the darkness that paralyzed me. My mind had locked me in my own body and refused to let me go. It was one of the most terrifying moments in my life. The colors danced behind my lids as I tried to open them. I thought that I was dreaming, but they seemed so real. Battered and mutilated, every time a new scene came to mind, I poised to fight, but I could never move. In moments like that, I contemplated how frail my existence really was. It was a deep thought—one that I wasn't quite ready to face.
Eventually, I heard noises. Cracked voices whispered into my ears to get me to gain consciousness. I wondered if they were loving or urgent. I cooked romantic images in my mind as to how Michael would pick me up in his arms and nurse me to health.
The fear of what was to come after my heart stopped beating, pushed me to consider such stupid notions. Had it been any other day after that, I would have laughed humorlessly and killed the person who would make me think of such things.
Harsher words and curses followed. Things came into perspective as time passed by. I could feel the cutting fabric of the rope digging into my wrists and ankles. I could feel the salty rag pressing up against my dry mouth. I could feel the pain radiating from my stomach and projecting outwards.
I tried to think of the last thing I remembered happening to me.
Images of my father's body flashed in my mind.
Fighting Anthony followed soon after.
His pleas for me to hold on confused me.
And I remembered the darkness as I tried to remove the feeling of warmth from my body.
I had never imagined that the scenario would change like that. Had he bound me up so that I won't be able to escape? A little paranoid part of me screamed at me to realize that everything that had been said to me or I had seen had been fabricated.
There had to be an explanation for everything.
Was I ready to face it?
Yes.
Yes, I was.
I forced my eyes to open. They weighed a thousand kilos. I tried to focus on the blurry shapes in front of me.
"The princess is finally awake!" I heard someone say. I knew that voice.
Focus, I hissed to myself.
I shook my head to gain some clarity. It somehow worked.
Aware of my surroundings, I looked around to find the room filled with men who were chatting among themselves. Fear crept into my veins and I tried harder to search for the face that I knew would comfort me.
I saw him. I could see him standing in the shadows, the cigarette hanging from his lips. His posture gave him away. As he leaned away from the wall, I saw the nonchalant look on his face. He looked at me with curious eyes, seeming happy that I had opened my eyes.
I commanded my body to relax, and judge my environment.
Why was I bound?
Whose voice did I hear?
Look around.
I did.
I could see Luke Darcy kneeling in front of me. He was on his knees with his face split in a grin.
"Hello there, dear." He got off his knees to remove the gag from my mouth. I licked my teeth and lips to moisten them. He chuckled as he offered me a glass of water. I gave him a hard look. "Don't be shy..." he teased. I ground my teeth together, fighting the urge to tell him to fuck off.
He grabbed my chin to force my mouth open. He tipped the glass to pour the water down my throat. I had half expected it to be something that would burn down my throat, but I was shocked to find that it was plain water. I tried to act angry but was glad that I was offered the water.
I wouldn't let them know, though.
"Good girl," he cooed. "Now, I am going to ask you some questions, and you are going to answer me. After you do, I will unbind you and let you go." It was my turn to smirk. "Do you have something to say?" he asked, the challenge clear in his voice.
Might as well play a little with the man.
"As a matter of fact, I do." My voice came out more like a raspy whisper. I didn't find the humor seeping through the words, either. My throat was too dry to help me add some dramatics to the act. "You can stop bullshitting me."
"Which part of what I said sounded like shit to you, girl?" the glimmer in his eyes betrayed the sneer on his face. He was clearly enjoying the game. Like I knew he would.
"You say you will let me go." I chuckled under my breath and shook my head.
"What have you been teaching the girl, Anthony?" he hollered out. My eyes wandered to Anthony, too. He looked at Darcy and shrugged.
"That came with the package. She's too much of a self-righteous bitch to learn anything from me."
I rolled my eyes to myself.
Anthony Murray knew how to act. There was no doubt about that.
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